Fic: Dig the Hole Wide and Deep (11/?)
Oct. 28th, 2007 11:23 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
jayceepat.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
nickngregTitle: Dig the Hole Wide and Deep
Rating: NC-17 for some adult situations.
Pairing: Nick/Greg
Warnings: None
Summary: Intervention.
Spoilers: None
A/N: This is a sequel to ‘Putting Down Roots’ which you can find
here
Previous parts of this story can be found here
It had been a tumultuous five days since Nick woke up in a strange place with his mother, father, Greg (GREG…WTF?) and a strange man standing there looking at him. What was even stranger, his folks seemed to know Greg quite well and all three of them knew the strange man but Nick was certain he’d never seen him before.
For Nick, the most frustrating thing of all was no one was telling him anything. He spoke with his mom and dad at least once a day and sometimes several times. All they said was they loved him, they wanted him healed and they would not talk about anything over the phone. They told him they would see him in less than a week and then they would have a family council.
Nick refused to cooperate with the strange man who he now knew was Dr. Alan Perkins, a psychologist (and where the hell had his mom and dad met a Las Vegas psychologist in the first place) although he was always courteous to his nurses and the other clinic employee’s who took care of him. He absolutely would not talk to Alan at all. He insisted the last thing he needed was some shrink he didn’t know, trying to mess with his mind.
Nick had been scamming people for so long, he was certain all he had to do was bat his eyes at his mom and give her ‘the puppy dog’ look and he would have her eating out of his hand. His dad, well he was a little tougher. He thought he might try the earnest, young, ‘I want to make it on my own without trading on the family name’ routine; the one he’d had such success with when he used it on Jim Brass.
The thing that had him worried the most was his parent’s easy attitude with Greg. When had that happened and how? To the best of his knowledge, they had only met Greg casually when they had come to Vegas during the Walter Gordon affair. He was going to get some answers and if he had to wait five days to do so; well he could be patient. They didn’t know who they were dealing with but he would show them all.
Alan Perkins fit right in with the CSI group; he had a truly devious mind. He was going to have an intervention to end them all with Mr. Stokes when his folks got there. Greg and Bobby were coming and Nick was going to face them and he was going to listen or he was going back into the ‘dark place’ and stay there forever. Alan had as big an ego as the next guy and he was sure, he was the only therapist who could pull Nick out of the dark and into life again. If Nick didn’t see it his way, he was washing his hands of the whole matter and they could take Nick out of the clinic. The first thing he learned, the very first: You cannot help a patient who does not want to help themselves.
* * *
By the time his folks were able to return to Las Vegas, Nick’s wounds were healed, the colostomy bag was gone and the small dimple/scar in his lower right side was the only reminder of the trip to hell. He had no reason (in his mind) to be stuck in the clinic when he was so obviously ready to return to work. It infuriated him that he was the only one who seemed to have that opinion. He had also refused consistently to see Greg or Bobby and the fact that he never asked why Bobby wanted to come visit was proof to Alan that his original hypothesis, that Nick knew what was going on, was correct. If he didn’t remember Greg, Bobby and Steve rescuing him, then he should have been asking why Bobby was the only one of his team-mates that wanted to see him.
Nick also insisted he had no memory of going to the club or being ‘attacked’ (his word) or how he had received his injuries. He had heard enough while waking from his long sleep to know there were three attackers and he used that information to bolster his story that he had been overwhelmed by strangers and he knew nothing after that. Boy was he in for a shock.
He was really impatient for his folks to get there. He couldn’t understand why it was taking so long to get from the airport. His dad had called him and told him they had landed and were going to pick up their luggage and would see him soon but that was a long time ago. It also pissed him off no end that he really didn’t know where this fucking clinic was located. He couldn’t see anything out the window’s that looked familiar and he was not permitted off his floor. If he’d known his mom and dad were down in Alan’s office planning strategy, he would have gone through the roof.
Nick’s parents hadn’t been there that long when Greg and Bobby arrived. Alan told them his plan and they did a little fine tuning and when they were pretty sure they had it all planned out, Bobby stood up and said, “OK let’s get this ‘come to Jesus meetin’ started.”
Bill Stokes looked at him and said, “So that ‘aw shucks’ routine you pulled on me wasn’t complete hog wash?”
Bobby flashed his sweet, open grin and replied, “Hey, you of all people ought to know a good ole Southern drawl can work wonders in a tense situation.”
Bill just slapped him on the back and said, “Mother, I don’t know whether it’s a good idea to leave the boy here or not. Between this one and Greg, who knows what we’re gonna get back.”
Alan stood up and led his small band of brigands down the hall towards the elevator. “Let’s hope this works and you get a physically AND mentally healthy man back when we’re through.”
Jillian Stokes looked over at him and replied, “From your lips to Gods ears Dr. Perkins.”
* * *
Nick was pacing back and forth when the door opened. He expected to see his folks but instead, it was one of the newer orderlies; a young man with a pocket tag that identified him as Phillip. He told Nick he was there to take him down to a larger, better furnished room. There was only one really comfortable chair in his room and it wasn’t good for long visits.
Nick was thinking to himself that it wasn’t going to be a long visit. He was going to convince his folks to get him out of there and he would be back in his own house in time for the 6.00 PM news.
Phillip took Nick down one floor and knocked on a door just a short way down the hall from the elevator. A muffled ‘come in’ was heard and he opened the door, stood back and allowed Nick to enter. He smiled when Dr. Perkins thanked him for bringing Nick and told him they would see that he got safely back to his room. He was free to continue his normal duties.
Nick walked in the room. His mother rose and came forward to take him in her arms. He had forgotten how wonderful his mother’s hugs felt and how good she smelled. She always wore Elizabeth Arden’s ‘Alliage’. It smelled of green grass and fragrant herbs and he had loved the scent as long as he could remember. He held her for a long time and felt the tears start. He tried to hold them back as he let her go and turned to his father. He reached his hand out and was completely taken aback when his father, instead of shaking his hand as they usually did, pulled him into a bear hug. If he thought his mother’s familiar hug felt good, the feel of his father holding him close and patting him on the back was indescribable. Everyone was a little wet-eyed when they finally separated and found seats. The room they were in looked exactly like someone’s nicely decorated living room. There was a couch and several chairs, a big coffee table with a silver coffee service and plates of sandwiches and pastries. Jillian at once fell into her ‘Southern Gentlewoman’ persona and poured coffee for everyone while Alan insisted they fix themselves a plate and get comfortable. Both Jillian and Bill thanked him for the hospitality remarking that airline food should be bagged, tagged and examined at the nearest lab to see if there was any recognizable ‘food’ in it at all.
They chatted for a while and finally Nick could not stand it any longer and said that this was all real nice but he was sure his folks were tired and he was too and he wanted to get them home to his place. Little did he know he had just played right into the good doctor’s hands.
Alan put his plate down, leaned forward and said, “Well Nick, considering you were in a coma for eight days, I can’t in all good conscious release you until I’m sure you are completely recovered. The last time we talked, you said you still didn’t remember what happened and that loss of memory has both me and your folks concerned enough to think you need more treatment.
Nick felt every muscle in his body tighten up so hard, he swore he could feel his balls jump up into his stomach cavity. He carefully set his cup down and smiled at Alan; wishing he could just bare his teeth and tear the guy to pieces.
“Well now Dr. Perkins, that’s not exactly what I said. I said I couldn’t remember what happened after those guys jumped me. They must have knocked me out and everything after that was gone but I remember the events leading up to my attack.”
“Do you really? I must have misunderstood you. I could have sworn you told me you had no recollection of ever going in that bar.” Alan knew exactly how a fisherman felt when he got a good strike. He was just reeling him in so he could set the hook.
“I do think you misunderstood me. That bar was the scene of several crimes during the three months after its opening. We’d been called there more than once for assaults and robberies. I thought maybe there was some drug activity going on so I decided to drop in there one morning when I got off work a little early and just check it out for myself.”
Bill said, “My God son weren’t you putting yourself in danger doing that? Do they allow CSI’s to go undercover here?”
Nick realized he had two formidable opponents in his parents. He couldn’t pull the wool over their eyes like he was sure he could Alan’s. They had too much knowledge of the legal system from every angle. He was going to have to be very careful.
“No dad they don’t and I wasn’t trying to do undercover work. I just wanted to go there as a private citizen, look around a little, have a beer and see if there was anything going on that didn’t feel right. It might give us an extra edge the next time we were called out there.”
Alan looked closely at the elder Stokes. It never ceased to amaze him that women were called the ‘weaker sex’. In his opinion, women were stronger than men every time. He could tell from the expressions on their faces that Judge Stokes was buying every single word Nick was saying. He could also tell that Mama Stokes wasn’t. He knew the story of how Greg and his two friends had discovered Nick was in trouble and how they got him out. The senior Stokes did not. Greg had insisted that Nick be given a chance to come clean with his folks OR agree to counseling. If either of those scenario’s had occurred, Greg would keep his mouth shut forever. Alan had told him he was blowing smoke. Nick would never in a million years either tell the truth OR accept the fact that he needed help.
Bill was nodding his head as his son was talking. He turned to Jillian Stokes and asked, “What do you think dear? Perhaps just another week off to get his strength back and then back to work. What do you say?”
Jillian looked at her husband and her son. The two faces were so much alike and her heart ached because of the hope on both faces. Her husband was hoping that everyone had jumped to conclusions about his favorite boy and his favorite boy; well he was hoping that they were both buying his line of bullshit.
And that was exactly what Jillian Stokes said. “Bullshit.”
It would have been funny if the situation had not been so grave. Both men sort of gasped and blinked at her. Her husband said, “Jillian” in a very scandalized voice.
Jillian Stokes turned to Alan and told him it was time to bring out the big guns. He smiled at her, reached for the phone on the table beside him. He pressed 3 buttons and when the phone was picked up on the other end said, “Will you please join us now?”
* * *
Nick felt as though he had just stepped on a land mine. One moment, he knew he had his dad; he knew he had him completely and the next,his mother said ‘Bullshit’. His mother, who was the most completely feminine woman he’d ever known said ‘Bullshit’. Now, the door was opening and Greg and Bobby were walking into the room. What was worse, his mother was putting her hand out to Greg and pulling him down on the couch beside her. WHAT THE HELL WAS GOING ON?
Alan turned to Bobby and Greg and asked them if they’d heard the conversation clearly in the other room. Nick turned an alarming shade of red and yelled at everyone, “Do you mean you had them listening in on what was supposed to be a privileged conversation between me and my doctor?. You fucker, I could have you disbarred for that.”
Alan started to answer him but his mother intervened. “Nicholas Aron Stokes, you calm down this minute. In the first place, Dr. Perkins technically is not your doctor. He is representing the clinic here and both your father and I knew the boys were listening. Since we are the one’s paying the bill, our consent is what matters and if you want to challenge me on that, we have power of attorney to act for you. When you had been in a coma for 72 hours, we had the power drawn up so we could act on your behalf.”
Nick did not sit down, he collapsed like a punctured balloon. He knew there was no way in the world he could go against his mother when she put on the ‘cloak of authority’. “So now what, we all join hands and sing a rousing chorus of ‘What the World Needs Now?” If they thought he was just going to give up and let them do what ever they wanted to him they had another thought coming.
“No Nick, now Greg is going to tell you and your parents how and why he and Bobby and Steve risked their lives and their jobs to come rescue you; or are you going to try and claim you had the situation under control.”
Nick did not say a word. He crossed his arms belligerently across his chest and waited to see what Greg had to say.
Greg was just wishing the floor would open up and swallow him. He did not want to do this. He had come to care for Judge and Mrs. Stokes. They were really good people. Jillian treated him as though he was Nick’s partner and not his ex-fuck buddy. Bill Stokes was trying as hard as he could. He occasionally forgot what Greg had been to his son and acted like he could like him if they were just friends.
Jillian said, “Greg, I know you don’t want to do this, but you have to. You have to let Bill and Nick know just how bad things are. They have to hear the words before they can do anything to correct the problem.”
Nick looked coldly at his mother, “The only problem I see is the one you and dad have caused by keeping me a prisoner here.”
Greg raised his head and glared at Nick. “Don’t you dare speak to your mother like that. Do you have any idea how much she and your dad have suffered since this whole mess started?”
He stood up and started pacing around the room. He started with the frantic call he’d gotten from Rob.
Nick interrupted him, “I should have known that faggot friend of yours had something to do with this. Of course, you jumped the minute you heard his voice didn’t you. I bet he was creaming his pants while he was telling you he’d seen me in a gay bar. What was his problem? Did I ignore him?”
“No Nick, or rather yes, you did ignore him. He was the bartender who served you your beer and he did not call me until he saw you going into the back room with two of the three stooges after watching you rub your ass all over his dick while you were dancing with him. When he saw the third stooge heading back there, he knew you were in trouble. His exact words to me were Nick thought there were two of them and he went to the back with them but they always play in three’s and they play rough. There is always blood to clean up after they use a room. You need to get here fast and if you’ve got a gun, bring it.”
“I called Bobby and he and Steve met me at the club. Steve impersonated a police officer to get us into the club. Rob, the faggot Rob, greeted us when we came into the club and while pretending to seat us, he told us how to get to the back and what room they had you in. When we kicked the door in, you had….”
Nick said “Stop…for my mothers sake don’t go any further.”
Greg said, “So you do remember now?”
“No, not for sure but based on the injuries I’ve been treated for I can guess what you saw when you broke in.”
Nick was struggling. He was weighted down with shame and remorse and sadness. How could he have called Rob a faggot? Talk about the pot calling the kettle black!
“Nick, you need to know that Rob, the faggot…”
Nick raised his hand. “Don’t say that again. I had no right calling him that. Please don’t say that word again.”
“Ok, but you need to know that Rob is the one who figured out how to get you out of that hell-hole. He stole the keys to the back door from the owner’s office. He stood guard while we went and got the cars and opened the back door for us so we could get back in. He was even going to help us carry you out but we had the three stooges cuffed to chairs in that slaughterhouse and we didn’t want them to know he was the one who tipped us off. “
Bobby spoke up for the first time. “You know Nicky, Rob probably saved your life. From the amount of blood you’d already lost when we broke in, I don’t think you would have lasted too much longer. And I’m tellin’ you Texas, it wouldn’t have been a pleasant end.”
Nick put his head in his hands. He could not look at his mother or his father. Hell, he didn’t even want to look at Dr. Perkins. No one spoke for a good ten minutes. He finally raised his head and met his mother’s beautiful eyes. He saw no disgust, no hatred; only love. That was the only emotion he saw in her soft, wet brown eyes. He had gotten those eyes. His were just like hers. He wondered if he’d gotten her indomitable will.
He looked at his father. His father looked old and grey. Nick had never thought of his dad as old; never until now. His dad looked up at him. Nick could not read him the way he could his mother. He had no idea what was going through his father’s mind at that moment.
When Judge Stokes did speak, his voice was old and weak. In a quivery voice he said, “My lord son, how could we have failed you so badly? I know I was always trying to force you into the path I wanted for you. Is that what caused this? Is that why you had to go to a place like that?”
Nick had always heard the term ‘broken heart’ but for the first time he realized it was for real. He knew from the pain he felt at his dad’s words that his heart was breaking. How could he have done this to his parents? He got up and went over to his father. He got down on his knees in front of him and laid his hands on his knees.
He forced himself to look right in his dad’s tear filled eyes. “Dad, you and mom never failed me. You never did anything but love me and try to teach me right from wrong. I know you and I butt heads bad when I left Texas to come here but when you realized I was serious, you backed down and you both have been nothing but supportive ever since. I don’t know why I went there. I was hurting and I thought it was so completely different from what I usually liked that it would make me forget. I guess I forgot for 8 days. But this was one mistake and I’ve learned my lesson. Please take me out of here.”
Judge Stokes looked at this beautiful young man; his youngest and he admitted it now to himself, his favorite. He looked at those beautiful, dark, brown eyes so much like his mothers and finally realized how sick his boy was.
“Greg, was this one mistake?”
“No sir, Nick has been going to gay bars ever since he started with the crime lab.”
Nick swung around and yelled at Greg, “How the hell can you say that. You don’t know me. Just because we hung around together and played video games together, you think you can say things like that about me. You’re crazy.”
Bobby stood up and walked over to Nick and sat down on the arm of his dad’s chair. He reached out and grabbed Nick’s shoulder and pulled him around to face him.
“Nick, don’t dig the hole any deeper than you already have. Remember what Greg and I do for a living? While you were out of it, we were trying to figure out what brought you to ‘Ball and Chain’. Do you know what we found out? We took your picture to every single gay bar in Vegas and we found at least one person in every bar who knew you. Not by name of course. Just as a gorgeous guy who came in every once in a while, put on a show on the dance floor and picked up a guy and took him to one of the back rooms. Now that doesn’t sound too bad but when we started putting all the stories together, we realized you had to have been goin’ at least once a month.”
Greg spoke up at that point. “You know Nicky, if you weren’t so hot, you could have gotten away with it but even guys who just watched remembered you. We talked to a few of your ‘pick-ups’. Every single one of them said they’d give a months salary to have one more go at you. I really enjoyed listening to that.”
As angry as Nick was with Greg, he could not ignore the pain in his voice. Greg’s whole body was stiff and it was obvious he was barely holding his feelings under control. Nick bowed his head and thought for a moment. How could he get out of this?
Finally he raised his head and looked at his dad and then his mother. “What do you want me to do?”
His dad told him he’d called a man named Conrad Ecklie and asked that Nick be put on unpaid leave of absence due to a critical family emergency. He told him the leave was for six months. Nick gasped when he heard that. His dad heard him but he went on and told Nick that he and his mother wanted him to take the six months, stay in the clinic and work with Dr. Perkins to find out why he felt the need to go to a place like Ball and Chain.
Nick was shaking his head no before his dad even finished talking. He told them he could not stay at the clinic, he would go stark, staring mad and as for working with Dr. Perkins, he was the last person in the world he would trust to help him with emotional problems. He got up and went over to the window. He could hear everyone in the room behind him talking as though he wasn’t still in the room.
Suddenly Nick realized the window was acting just like a mirror and he could see what everyone in the room was doing. He saw ‘Alan’ walk over to Greg. He put his hand on Greg’s shoulder and began to rub his hand over Greg’s back. He was talking softly in Greg’s ear and Nick could see the tension leave Greg’s body as the doctor continued rubbing his back. Then the hand went up to Greg’s other shoulder and he hugged the young man to him. Nick saw Greg lean his head against Alan’s for a second. When he raised his head, he looked in the doctor’s eyes and gave him a small smile.
Nick felt a fire of pure rage start in his toes and rush up until it consumed his whole body in a blinding flame. He didn’t realize until much later he’d clenched his hands so hard, his nails had cut into his palms in a few places. He was screaming in his mind.
MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE. HE’S MINE YOU COCK-SUCKING SON-OF-A-BITCH. HOW DARE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON WHAT BELONGS TO ME? I’LL KILL YOU. I’LL RIP YOU TO PIECES AND STUFF YOUR PRICK DOWN YOUR THROAT. GREG IS MINE, BODY AND SOUL AND HE WILL ALWAYS BE MINE.
Nick was amazed to see everyone in the room still talking. Greg was standing beside Bobby and Bobby had his arm around his friend. JESUS CHRIST, DID EVERYONE IN THE WORLD THINK THEY HAD THE RIGHT TO TOUCH HIS PROPERTY. BOBBY, GET YOUR FUCKING ARM OFF MY BOY-FRIEND.
That must mean that the words screaming inside his head were just that; inside his head. He hadn’t said them out loud. That meant he still had an edge; plus they didn’t realize he could see what they were doing.
He turned back around and cleared his throat. At once, every head in the room turned in his direction. He knew he had to put on the performance of his life. He had to be apologetic and wounded and make them think he was buying into this whole pile of shit. But if it meant, keeping them away from Greg, he could do it. He had been putting on a brilliant performance for twenty-five years. This would be a piece of cake.
“Do all of you think this is necessary; please stay out of this Dr. Perkins. I’m asking my family and my friends.”
His mom and dad looked almost hopeful. Nick had a moment’s twinge when he thought of how he was fooling them but it quickly went away when he saw that Bobby still had a hand on Greg’s shoulder. Everyone started talking at the same time and the gist of it all was YES, they all thought this was something that would help him get control. He almost laughed out loud at that. God if they only knew. He was the one in complete control of everyone in the room.
He looked down and thought about the expression he should have on his face when he looked back up; scared, yeah that and determined and a little lost. That should do it. He looked back up and said, “Ok, I will try. But, I’m going to be here with no one at all familiar around me and mom and dad I know you can’t get up too often.”
Right on cue, both Greg and Bobby said, almost in unison, “Nick, we’ll be here every chance we get and Steve wants to come see you too. We won’t leave you alone we promise.”
Nick turned away, supposedly overcome with emotion. Actually he needed to hide the grin he could feel bubbling up around the edges of his mouth. When he had himself under control again, he turned back and added, “And if I have to stay in that room all the time, I will go insane for sure.”
His folks turned to Dr. Perkins. Alan said, “Nick, we have a pool, a complete gym, a huge library and beautiful grounds. If you are serious about giving this a try, there is no reason why you can’t have access to every amenity the clinic has to offer.”
Nick made sure his voice shook just a little as he said, “Ok. I’m going to give it a try.”
He slowly put his hand out to Bobby and Greg. They both reached out to him; Bobby grabbing his hand and shaking it like he really meant it and Greg grabbed Nick’s other arm and hung on with both hands. His mom and dad came over and joined in the group hug.
Inside he was thinking, “Perkins, you bastard, you’re never going to know what hit you.”
Rating: NC-17 for some adult situations.
Pairing: Nick/Greg
Warnings: None
Summary: Intervention.
Spoilers: None
A/N: This is a sequel to ‘Putting Down Roots’ which you can find
here
Previous parts of this story can be found here
It had been a tumultuous five days since Nick woke up in a strange place with his mother, father, Greg (GREG…WTF?) and a strange man standing there looking at him. What was even stranger, his folks seemed to know Greg quite well and all three of them knew the strange man but Nick was certain he’d never seen him before.
For Nick, the most frustrating thing of all was no one was telling him anything. He spoke with his mom and dad at least once a day and sometimes several times. All they said was they loved him, they wanted him healed and they would not talk about anything over the phone. They told him they would see him in less than a week and then they would have a family council.
Nick refused to cooperate with the strange man who he now knew was Dr. Alan Perkins, a psychologist (and where the hell had his mom and dad met a Las Vegas psychologist in the first place) although he was always courteous to his nurses and the other clinic employee’s who took care of him. He absolutely would not talk to Alan at all. He insisted the last thing he needed was some shrink he didn’t know, trying to mess with his mind.
Nick had been scamming people for so long, he was certain all he had to do was bat his eyes at his mom and give her ‘the puppy dog’ look and he would have her eating out of his hand. His dad, well he was a little tougher. He thought he might try the earnest, young, ‘I want to make it on my own without trading on the family name’ routine; the one he’d had such success with when he used it on Jim Brass.
The thing that had him worried the most was his parent’s easy attitude with Greg. When had that happened and how? To the best of his knowledge, they had only met Greg casually when they had come to Vegas during the Walter Gordon affair. He was going to get some answers and if he had to wait five days to do so; well he could be patient. They didn’t know who they were dealing with but he would show them all.
Alan Perkins fit right in with the CSI group; he had a truly devious mind. He was going to have an intervention to end them all with Mr. Stokes when his folks got there. Greg and Bobby were coming and Nick was going to face them and he was going to listen or he was going back into the ‘dark place’ and stay there forever. Alan had as big an ego as the next guy and he was sure, he was the only therapist who could pull Nick out of the dark and into life again. If Nick didn’t see it his way, he was washing his hands of the whole matter and they could take Nick out of the clinic. The first thing he learned, the very first: You cannot help a patient who does not want to help themselves.
* * *
By the time his folks were able to return to Las Vegas, Nick’s wounds were healed, the colostomy bag was gone and the small dimple/scar in his lower right side was the only reminder of the trip to hell. He had no reason (in his mind) to be stuck in the clinic when he was so obviously ready to return to work. It infuriated him that he was the only one who seemed to have that opinion. He had also refused consistently to see Greg or Bobby and the fact that he never asked why Bobby wanted to come visit was proof to Alan that his original hypothesis, that Nick knew what was going on, was correct. If he didn’t remember Greg, Bobby and Steve rescuing him, then he should have been asking why Bobby was the only one of his team-mates that wanted to see him.
Nick also insisted he had no memory of going to the club or being ‘attacked’ (his word) or how he had received his injuries. He had heard enough while waking from his long sleep to know there were three attackers and he used that information to bolster his story that he had been overwhelmed by strangers and he knew nothing after that. Boy was he in for a shock.
He was really impatient for his folks to get there. He couldn’t understand why it was taking so long to get from the airport. His dad had called him and told him they had landed and were going to pick up their luggage and would see him soon but that was a long time ago. It also pissed him off no end that he really didn’t know where this fucking clinic was located. He couldn’t see anything out the window’s that looked familiar and he was not permitted off his floor. If he’d known his mom and dad were down in Alan’s office planning strategy, he would have gone through the roof.
Nick’s parents hadn’t been there that long when Greg and Bobby arrived. Alan told them his plan and they did a little fine tuning and when they were pretty sure they had it all planned out, Bobby stood up and said, “OK let’s get this ‘come to Jesus meetin’ started.”
Bill Stokes looked at him and said, “So that ‘aw shucks’ routine you pulled on me wasn’t complete hog wash?”
Bobby flashed his sweet, open grin and replied, “Hey, you of all people ought to know a good ole Southern drawl can work wonders in a tense situation.”
Bill just slapped him on the back and said, “Mother, I don’t know whether it’s a good idea to leave the boy here or not. Between this one and Greg, who knows what we’re gonna get back.”
Alan stood up and led his small band of brigands down the hall towards the elevator. “Let’s hope this works and you get a physically AND mentally healthy man back when we’re through.”
Jillian Stokes looked over at him and replied, “From your lips to Gods ears Dr. Perkins.”
* * *
Nick was pacing back and forth when the door opened. He expected to see his folks but instead, it was one of the newer orderlies; a young man with a pocket tag that identified him as Phillip. He told Nick he was there to take him down to a larger, better furnished room. There was only one really comfortable chair in his room and it wasn’t good for long visits.
Nick was thinking to himself that it wasn’t going to be a long visit. He was going to convince his folks to get him out of there and he would be back in his own house in time for the 6.00 PM news.
Phillip took Nick down one floor and knocked on a door just a short way down the hall from the elevator. A muffled ‘come in’ was heard and he opened the door, stood back and allowed Nick to enter. He smiled when Dr. Perkins thanked him for bringing Nick and told him they would see that he got safely back to his room. He was free to continue his normal duties.
Nick walked in the room. His mother rose and came forward to take him in her arms. He had forgotten how wonderful his mother’s hugs felt and how good she smelled. She always wore Elizabeth Arden’s ‘Alliage’. It smelled of green grass and fragrant herbs and he had loved the scent as long as he could remember. He held her for a long time and felt the tears start. He tried to hold them back as he let her go and turned to his father. He reached his hand out and was completely taken aback when his father, instead of shaking his hand as they usually did, pulled him into a bear hug. If he thought his mother’s familiar hug felt good, the feel of his father holding him close and patting him on the back was indescribable. Everyone was a little wet-eyed when they finally separated and found seats. The room they were in looked exactly like someone’s nicely decorated living room. There was a couch and several chairs, a big coffee table with a silver coffee service and plates of sandwiches and pastries. Jillian at once fell into her ‘Southern Gentlewoman’ persona and poured coffee for everyone while Alan insisted they fix themselves a plate and get comfortable. Both Jillian and Bill thanked him for the hospitality remarking that airline food should be bagged, tagged and examined at the nearest lab to see if there was any recognizable ‘food’ in it at all.
They chatted for a while and finally Nick could not stand it any longer and said that this was all real nice but he was sure his folks were tired and he was too and he wanted to get them home to his place. Little did he know he had just played right into the good doctor’s hands.
Alan put his plate down, leaned forward and said, “Well Nick, considering you were in a coma for eight days, I can’t in all good conscious release you until I’m sure you are completely recovered. The last time we talked, you said you still didn’t remember what happened and that loss of memory has both me and your folks concerned enough to think you need more treatment.
Nick felt every muscle in his body tighten up so hard, he swore he could feel his balls jump up into his stomach cavity. He carefully set his cup down and smiled at Alan; wishing he could just bare his teeth and tear the guy to pieces.
“Well now Dr. Perkins, that’s not exactly what I said. I said I couldn’t remember what happened after those guys jumped me. They must have knocked me out and everything after that was gone but I remember the events leading up to my attack.”
“Do you really? I must have misunderstood you. I could have sworn you told me you had no recollection of ever going in that bar.” Alan knew exactly how a fisherman felt when he got a good strike. He was just reeling him in so he could set the hook.
“I do think you misunderstood me. That bar was the scene of several crimes during the three months after its opening. We’d been called there more than once for assaults and robberies. I thought maybe there was some drug activity going on so I decided to drop in there one morning when I got off work a little early and just check it out for myself.”
Bill said, “My God son weren’t you putting yourself in danger doing that? Do they allow CSI’s to go undercover here?”
Nick realized he had two formidable opponents in his parents. He couldn’t pull the wool over their eyes like he was sure he could Alan’s. They had too much knowledge of the legal system from every angle. He was going to have to be very careful.
“No dad they don’t and I wasn’t trying to do undercover work. I just wanted to go there as a private citizen, look around a little, have a beer and see if there was anything going on that didn’t feel right. It might give us an extra edge the next time we were called out there.”
Alan looked closely at the elder Stokes. It never ceased to amaze him that women were called the ‘weaker sex’. In his opinion, women were stronger than men every time. He could tell from the expressions on their faces that Judge Stokes was buying every single word Nick was saying. He could also tell that Mama Stokes wasn’t. He knew the story of how Greg and his two friends had discovered Nick was in trouble and how they got him out. The senior Stokes did not. Greg had insisted that Nick be given a chance to come clean with his folks OR agree to counseling. If either of those scenario’s had occurred, Greg would keep his mouth shut forever. Alan had told him he was blowing smoke. Nick would never in a million years either tell the truth OR accept the fact that he needed help.
Bill was nodding his head as his son was talking. He turned to Jillian Stokes and asked, “What do you think dear? Perhaps just another week off to get his strength back and then back to work. What do you say?”
Jillian looked at her husband and her son. The two faces were so much alike and her heart ached because of the hope on both faces. Her husband was hoping that everyone had jumped to conclusions about his favorite boy and his favorite boy; well he was hoping that they were both buying his line of bullshit.
And that was exactly what Jillian Stokes said. “Bullshit.”
It would have been funny if the situation had not been so grave. Both men sort of gasped and blinked at her. Her husband said, “Jillian” in a very scandalized voice.
Jillian Stokes turned to Alan and told him it was time to bring out the big guns. He smiled at her, reached for the phone on the table beside him. He pressed 3 buttons and when the phone was picked up on the other end said, “Will you please join us now?”
* * *
Nick felt as though he had just stepped on a land mine. One moment, he knew he had his dad; he knew he had him completely and the next,his mother said ‘Bullshit’. His mother, who was the most completely feminine woman he’d ever known said ‘Bullshit’. Now, the door was opening and Greg and Bobby were walking into the room. What was worse, his mother was putting her hand out to Greg and pulling him down on the couch beside her. WHAT THE HELL WAS GOING ON?
Alan turned to Bobby and Greg and asked them if they’d heard the conversation clearly in the other room. Nick turned an alarming shade of red and yelled at everyone, “Do you mean you had them listening in on what was supposed to be a privileged conversation between me and my doctor?. You fucker, I could have you disbarred for that.”
Alan started to answer him but his mother intervened. “Nicholas Aron Stokes, you calm down this minute. In the first place, Dr. Perkins technically is not your doctor. He is representing the clinic here and both your father and I knew the boys were listening. Since we are the one’s paying the bill, our consent is what matters and if you want to challenge me on that, we have power of attorney to act for you. When you had been in a coma for 72 hours, we had the power drawn up so we could act on your behalf.”
Nick did not sit down, he collapsed like a punctured balloon. He knew there was no way in the world he could go against his mother when she put on the ‘cloak of authority’. “So now what, we all join hands and sing a rousing chorus of ‘What the World Needs Now?” If they thought he was just going to give up and let them do what ever they wanted to him they had another thought coming.
“No Nick, now Greg is going to tell you and your parents how and why he and Bobby and Steve risked their lives and their jobs to come rescue you; or are you going to try and claim you had the situation under control.”
Nick did not say a word. He crossed his arms belligerently across his chest and waited to see what Greg had to say.
Greg was just wishing the floor would open up and swallow him. He did not want to do this. He had come to care for Judge and Mrs. Stokes. They were really good people. Jillian treated him as though he was Nick’s partner and not his ex-fuck buddy. Bill Stokes was trying as hard as he could. He occasionally forgot what Greg had been to his son and acted like he could like him if they were just friends.
Jillian said, “Greg, I know you don’t want to do this, but you have to. You have to let Bill and Nick know just how bad things are. They have to hear the words before they can do anything to correct the problem.”
Nick looked coldly at his mother, “The only problem I see is the one you and dad have caused by keeping me a prisoner here.”
Greg raised his head and glared at Nick. “Don’t you dare speak to your mother like that. Do you have any idea how much she and your dad have suffered since this whole mess started?”
He stood up and started pacing around the room. He started with the frantic call he’d gotten from Rob.
Nick interrupted him, “I should have known that faggot friend of yours had something to do with this. Of course, you jumped the minute you heard his voice didn’t you. I bet he was creaming his pants while he was telling you he’d seen me in a gay bar. What was his problem? Did I ignore him?”
“No Nick, or rather yes, you did ignore him. He was the bartender who served you your beer and he did not call me until he saw you going into the back room with two of the three stooges after watching you rub your ass all over his dick while you were dancing with him. When he saw the third stooge heading back there, he knew you were in trouble. His exact words to me were Nick thought there were two of them and he went to the back with them but they always play in three’s and they play rough. There is always blood to clean up after they use a room. You need to get here fast and if you’ve got a gun, bring it.”
“I called Bobby and he and Steve met me at the club. Steve impersonated a police officer to get us into the club. Rob, the faggot Rob, greeted us when we came into the club and while pretending to seat us, he told us how to get to the back and what room they had you in. When we kicked the door in, you had….”
Nick said “Stop…for my mothers sake don’t go any further.”
Greg said, “So you do remember now?”
“No, not for sure but based on the injuries I’ve been treated for I can guess what you saw when you broke in.”
Nick was struggling. He was weighted down with shame and remorse and sadness. How could he have called Rob a faggot? Talk about the pot calling the kettle black!
“Nick, you need to know that Rob, the faggot…”
Nick raised his hand. “Don’t say that again. I had no right calling him that. Please don’t say that word again.”
“Ok, but you need to know that Rob is the one who figured out how to get you out of that hell-hole. He stole the keys to the back door from the owner’s office. He stood guard while we went and got the cars and opened the back door for us so we could get back in. He was even going to help us carry you out but we had the three stooges cuffed to chairs in that slaughterhouse and we didn’t want them to know he was the one who tipped us off. “
Bobby spoke up for the first time. “You know Nicky, Rob probably saved your life. From the amount of blood you’d already lost when we broke in, I don’t think you would have lasted too much longer. And I’m tellin’ you Texas, it wouldn’t have been a pleasant end.”
Nick put his head in his hands. He could not look at his mother or his father. Hell, he didn’t even want to look at Dr. Perkins. No one spoke for a good ten minutes. He finally raised his head and met his mother’s beautiful eyes. He saw no disgust, no hatred; only love. That was the only emotion he saw in her soft, wet brown eyes. He had gotten those eyes. His were just like hers. He wondered if he’d gotten her indomitable will.
He looked at his father. His father looked old and grey. Nick had never thought of his dad as old; never until now. His dad looked up at him. Nick could not read him the way he could his mother. He had no idea what was going through his father’s mind at that moment.
When Judge Stokes did speak, his voice was old and weak. In a quivery voice he said, “My lord son, how could we have failed you so badly? I know I was always trying to force you into the path I wanted for you. Is that what caused this? Is that why you had to go to a place like that?”
Nick had always heard the term ‘broken heart’ but for the first time he realized it was for real. He knew from the pain he felt at his dad’s words that his heart was breaking. How could he have done this to his parents? He got up and went over to his father. He got down on his knees in front of him and laid his hands on his knees.
He forced himself to look right in his dad’s tear filled eyes. “Dad, you and mom never failed me. You never did anything but love me and try to teach me right from wrong. I know you and I butt heads bad when I left Texas to come here but when you realized I was serious, you backed down and you both have been nothing but supportive ever since. I don’t know why I went there. I was hurting and I thought it was so completely different from what I usually liked that it would make me forget. I guess I forgot for 8 days. But this was one mistake and I’ve learned my lesson. Please take me out of here.”
Judge Stokes looked at this beautiful young man; his youngest and he admitted it now to himself, his favorite. He looked at those beautiful, dark, brown eyes so much like his mothers and finally realized how sick his boy was.
“Greg, was this one mistake?”
“No sir, Nick has been going to gay bars ever since he started with the crime lab.”
Nick swung around and yelled at Greg, “How the hell can you say that. You don’t know me. Just because we hung around together and played video games together, you think you can say things like that about me. You’re crazy.”
Bobby stood up and walked over to Nick and sat down on the arm of his dad’s chair. He reached out and grabbed Nick’s shoulder and pulled him around to face him.
“Nick, don’t dig the hole any deeper than you already have. Remember what Greg and I do for a living? While you were out of it, we were trying to figure out what brought you to ‘Ball and Chain’. Do you know what we found out? We took your picture to every single gay bar in Vegas and we found at least one person in every bar who knew you. Not by name of course. Just as a gorgeous guy who came in every once in a while, put on a show on the dance floor and picked up a guy and took him to one of the back rooms. Now that doesn’t sound too bad but when we started putting all the stories together, we realized you had to have been goin’ at least once a month.”
Greg spoke up at that point. “You know Nicky, if you weren’t so hot, you could have gotten away with it but even guys who just watched remembered you. We talked to a few of your ‘pick-ups’. Every single one of them said they’d give a months salary to have one more go at you. I really enjoyed listening to that.”
As angry as Nick was with Greg, he could not ignore the pain in his voice. Greg’s whole body was stiff and it was obvious he was barely holding his feelings under control. Nick bowed his head and thought for a moment. How could he get out of this?
Finally he raised his head and looked at his dad and then his mother. “What do you want me to do?”
His dad told him he’d called a man named Conrad Ecklie and asked that Nick be put on unpaid leave of absence due to a critical family emergency. He told him the leave was for six months. Nick gasped when he heard that. His dad heard him but he went on and told Nick that he and his mother wanted him to take the six months, stay in the clinic and work with Dr. Perkins to find out why he felt the need to go to a place like Ball and Chain.
Nick was shaking his head no before his dad even finished talking. He told them he could not stay at the clinic, he would go stark, staring mad and as for working with Dr. Perkins, he was the last person in the world he would trust to help him with emotional problems. He got up and went over to the window. He could hear everyone in the room behind him talking as though he wasn’t still in the room.
Suddenly Nick realized the window was acting just like a mirror and he could see what everyone in the room was doing. He saw ‘Alan’ walk over to Greg. He put his hand on Greg’s shoulder and began to rub his hand over Greg’s back. He was talking softly in Greg’s ear and Nick could see the tension leave Greg’s body as the doctor continued rubbing his back. Then the hand went up to Greg’s other shoulder and he hugged the young man to him. Nick saw Greg lean his head against Alan’s for a second. When he raised his head, he looked in the doctor’s eyes and gave him a small smile.
Nick felt a fire of pure rage start in his toes and rush up until it consumed his whole body in a blinding flame. He didn’t realize until much later he’d clenched his hands so hard, his nails had cut into his palms in a few places. He was screaming in his mind.
MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE. HE’S MINE YOU COCK-SUCKING SON-OF-A-BITCH. HOW DARE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON WHAT BELONGS TO ME? I’LL KILL YOU. I’LL RIP YOU TO PIECES AND STUFF YOUR PRICK DOWN YOUR THROAT. GREG IS MINE, BODY AND SOUL AND HE WILL ALWAYS BE MINE.
Nick was amazed to see everyone in the room still talking. Greg was standing beside Bobby and Bobby had his arm around his friend. JESUS CHRIST, DID EVERYONE IN THE WORLD THINK THEY HAD THE RIGHT TO TOUCH HIS PROPERTY. BOBBY, GET YOUR FUCKING ARM OFF MY BOY-FRIEND.
That must mean that the words screaming inside his head were just that; inside his head. He hadn’t said them out loud. That meant he still had an edge; plus they didn’t realize he could see what they were doing.
He turned back around and cleared his throat. At once, every head in the room turned in his direction. He knew he had to put on the performance of his life. He had to be apologetic and wounded and make them think he was buying into this whole pile of shit. But if it meant, keeping them away from Greg, he could do it. He had been putting on a brilliant performance for twenty-five years. This would be a piece of cake.
“Do all of you think this is necessary; please stay out of this Dr. Perkins. I’m asking my family and my friends.”
His mom and dad looked almost hopeful. Nick had a moment’s twinge when he thought of how he was fooling them but it quickly went away when he saw that Bobby still had a hand on Greg’s shoulder. Everyone started talking at the same time and the gist of it all was YES, they all thought this was something that would help him get control. He almost laughed out loud at that. God if they only knew. He was the one in complete control of everyone in the room.
He looked down and thought about the expression he should have on his face when he looked back up; scared, yeah that and determined and a little lost. That should do it. He looked back up and said, “Ok, I will try. But, I’m going to be here with no one at all familiar around me and mom and dad I know you can’t get up too often.”
Right on cue, both Greg and Bobby said, almost in unison, “Nick, we’ll be here every chance we get and Steve wants to come see you too. We won’t leave you alone we promise.”
Nick turned away, supposedly overcome with emotion. Actually he needed to hide the grin he could feel bubbling up around the edges of his mouth. When he had himself under control again, he turned back and added, “And if I have to stay in that room all the time, I will go insane for sure.”
His folks turned to Dr. Perkins. Alan said, “Nick, we have a pool, a complete gym, a huge library and beautiful grounds. If you are serious about giving this a try, there is no reason why you can’t have access to every amenity the clinic has to offer.”
Nick made sure his voice shook just a little as he said, “Ok. I’m going to give it a try.”
He slowly put his hand out to Bobby and Greg. They both reached out to him; Bobby grabbing his hand and shaking it like he really meant it and Greg grabbed Nick’s other arm and hung on with both hands. His mom and dad came over and joined in the group hug.
Inside he was thinking, “Perkins, you bastard, you’re never going to know what hit you.”
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Date: 2007-10-29 07:30 am (UTC)no subject
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