(no subject)
Mar. 26th, 2007 11:30 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
kieksterbanjo.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
nickngregRating: Chapter 24: PG13
Author: kieksterbanjo
Warnings: None
Summary: Fathers before anything else...Nick and Greg take on the challenge of raising children
Disclaimer: Would I like to own them? YES. But do I? Alas No. I would also like to make money from this and marry Benji Schwimmer from So You Think You Can Dance but one must live in the real world. *sigh*
A/N: Chapter 24 did not fit into one post....THIS IS PART 2...READ Part 1 (below) FIRST
It was two and a half days later and Greg felt like he had been thrown in a dryer and set on fluff. He didn’t really know which way was up and the sterile environment of the hospital with its white walls that seemed to glow were not helping him feel less dizzy.
He looked down when he heard a gurgle and a soft smile crossed his lips as he shifted the little girl in the pink blanket currently nestled in his arms. Isabelle James Sanders-Stokes was a beautiful baby and Greg suspected it was probably because she looked more like Leighanne then she did him.
It was the whirl of a hospital machine that brought his eyes from his daughter…to his son. Greg’s eyes crinkled at the sides at the sight of the frail little body inside the incubator, hooked up to more machines then Greg thought it could handle. Those machines however were what were keeping Austin Eric Sanders-Stokes alive. An I.V., a ventilator, a heart monitor and a dozen more Greg didn’t understand.
The doctor had said that it was a fine line they had to walk. The deformation in his son’s heart had to be repaired as soon as possible, his aorta was to narrow in one spot which was causing an insufficient amount of blood to be pumped around his body, but they couldn’t do the surgery until his lungs could work on their own. So they waited, and every minute killed Greg.
Greg heard voices in the hallway outside the NICU room and while he had all but tuned them out over the past couple of days these voices caught his ear because he recognized them. He furrowed his brow when he realized the voices of Nick and Leighanne were arguing.
“…don’t have to go!” He heard Nick say.
“Yes I do Nick. I’m going back to Texas.” Leighanne said back.
“But you just had surgery.” Nick reasoned in the tone only Nick could use.
Leighanne sighed, as Greg had done many times in the past when Nick had given him that tone, “Nick I don’t want to be here!” She fired back and Greg’s eyebrows furrowed more. Greg had always been wary of Leighanne because he wasn’t sure if she was going to want to someday take back what had been hers in the beginning, he just never thought she so vehemently wanted nothing to do with it. Somehow that made him angrier then the first thought ever had.
“But you can’t just leave!” Greg had heard this tone in Nick’s voice before as well. The argument had obviously been going on for a long time before Greg became privy to it because Nick only resorted to that particular tone when all the other ones hadn’t worked.
“Look Nicky,” Leighane sighed as if defeated, “This happens every time.” Her voice was strained as if she was trying to fight back tears, “You may think it’s easy for me to see your happy family and then walk away, back to my one bedroom apartment but it’s not okay. It hurts so much I cry myself to sleep for months after I leave you guys. But I do it. Because I love you and I want you to be happy. But my defenses are even lower right now because of the surgery and the situation with the baby so I have to leave. Please Nicky…”
Greg closed his eyes. He had been so busy trying to figure out Leighanne’s ulterior motives that he missed the fact that she had none. She had given up so much and was obviously deeply affected by it. He wanted to kick himself for thinking bad of her over the years. He shuffled out of the NICU room to interrupt Nick before his husband could respond to Leighanne, “Are you leaving?” He asked lamely.
Leighanne startled, wincing slightly when the move hurt her stomach and then nodded, “Yeah I’m heading back to Texas.” She looked down at the bundle in Greg’s arms and she appeared to wince again, “Good luck with everything.” She whispered softly before turning her back slowly on the two men.
Nick sighed with his hands on his hips and shook his head, obviously not satisfied with the outcome of their talk, “Hey Leighanne?” Greg called to her and she turned around slightly.
Greg gestured to Isabelle in his arms with a small smile, “Do you…want to hold her?”
Leighanne and Nick each had the same reaction; a look of shock forming on their features. Leighanne laughed softly and shook her head, “I…really shouldn’t.”
Greg scoffed, “Sure you should.” He said softly, offering the baby to the woman he would probably never see again but was just beginning to understand.
Leighanne looked like she was about to cry as she gingerly took the offered bundle into her arms and cradled it to her chest. The glow that appeared on her features as she looked down at the baby girl that was genetically half hers was astonishing, “Hey Isabelle James.” She giggled softly, “You can thank your Daddy for that middle name. He’s a bit kooky.” She looked up slyly at Greg who just shrugged with a small laugh, “But seriously Isabelle? You couldn’t ask for better Dads. They are going to love you probably more then humanly possible and they are going to help you make your life everything you want it to be. They’re pretty great guys. Give ‘em hell for me girl.” She whispered, kissing Isabelle’s hat covered forehead before settling the baby back into Greg’s arms, “Bye boys.” She sighed hugging Nick to her and then turning to Greg, who pulled her into a gentle hug.
“Bye Leighanne. Thank you.” Greg whispered and she turned again and walked down the hallway, out of sight.
Greg felt Nick behind his shoulder before he felt his arm rest across his back and give his side a little shake. Everything seemed oddly quiet in the hallway until it suddenly…wasn’t. Alarms sounded from inside the room Greg had just left and the two men in the hallway turned quickly to the window, “Please don’t let it be him.” Greg pleaded almost to himself, but his plea was not granted as a swarm of nurses and doctors crowded around the incubator containing Austin.
Greg and Nick could only stand by and watch as the team worked furiously on their son, both to afraid to look but more afraid to look away. It was several heart wrenching moments before the alarms stopped sounding and the whirling machines went back to their normal pulse. A moment after that Dr. Paul walked warily out of the room after being pointed in the right direction by a nurse who had seen Greg leave the NICU room moments before.
He sighed and wiped his forehead with the back of his hand, “We’re running out of time gentlemen. I don’t think we can wait any longer to get him into surgery. Not enough blood is getting pumped through the aorta for his body to keep functioning.” He explained.
“Are his lungs strong enough?” Greg asked.
“Unfortunately at this point they’ll just have to be. That’s the best answer I can give you.” Dr. Paul sighed, “We’ll have to get your consent Greg.”
“I won’t give it.” Greg said indignantly.
“What?” Nick asked surprised.
“I don’t want to send him into surgery if he’s not going to survive. I don’t know about you but to me that’s not an unreasonable idea.” Greg said exasperatedly.
“Greg, Austin can not survive much longer if we don’t do something.” Dr. Paul interjected softly.
“Can’t I consent?” Nick asked and Dr. Paul shook his head.
“The papers still haven’t been filed with your lawyer. Greg’s the only one who can make the decision.” He explained.
“And I’ve made it. We wait.” Greg said firmly and Dr. Paul sighed yet again, looking to Nick for help who nodded and turned to Greg as Dr. Paul walked slowly down the hall.
“Why are you acting like a child?” Nick asked once they were alone, turning to Greg with his arms crossed over his chest.
“Did you hear what Dr. Paul said? He’s not ready for surgery and going in to soon could kill him! How is being concerned about that being a child? I’m being the responsible one!” Greg fired back.
“Responsible my ass. At this point I would sign those papers in a heartbeat. You’re being selfish. You don’t want him to go into surgery because YOU’RE afraid of losing him. You’re not doing this in his best interest and THAT’S what makes you a child.”
“You’re right Nick. I AM afraid of losing him and I’m not afraid to say it.” Greg said shrugging his shoulders as much as he could with the baby in his arms, “I walked into this hospital two and a half days ago prepared to bring my twins home and I am NOT going to leave it having to bury my three day old son!” He was going red in the face and Isabelle had begun to cry in his arms, “You can call me a child all you want Nick but I’m not going to sign those forms until I’m certain that he’ll come out of this surgery alive because I am NOT going to be responsible for signing away my son’s life!”
“If you don’t sign them you’re killing him anyway!” Nick shouted back, “At least give him the best shot you can because Dr. Paul said it himself; we don’t have much time.”
Greg laughed maliciously and shook his head, “Fine Nick. I’ll sign the papers. You’re right, you’re always right. And hey what’s the worst that can happen? I’ve already killed someone else’s son in my lifetime so really what’s adding my own to the mix going to matter right?” He shook his head again and turned to stalk away from Nick, who was left standing with his hands on his hips…speechless.
-- -- --
Greg closed the door on the small room where his parents sat with Isabelle and walked slowly through the halls of the hospital in search of Nick. They needed to talk and he knew it. There was no way they were going to survive what came at them if they weren’t a unit. So Greg walked up and down the halls of the hospital hoping Nick hadn’t gone home or to work, but a glance at his watch told Greg it was still hours before work started.
Greg had signed the consent forms for Austin’s surgery but it would be hours before he knew anything about the outcome of the surgery he had consented too and he was trying his hardest to think of anything BUT that. In an effort to do so an idea formed in Greg’s head as to where his husband might be and he changed his direction to head for the hospital chapel. Nick had always said it was the one part of the hospital where there was no noise and he could go and think. Nick had confided in Greg that after his kidnapping he’d spent hours hiding out in the chapel to get away from the constant looks of pity and guilt being thrown his way.
Greg pushed open the wood door, cringing as it squeaked slightly at the hinges. He found Nick sitting in the second pew and his husband didn’t look up at the noise but instead kept his head bowed down. Greg moved in and knelt beside Nick, clasping his hands on the back of the pew in front of him. He was quiet for a moment, letting Nick finish whatever he was praying before speaking, “Am I doing this right? Should my knees be at a different angle? I don’t know any of the ‘moves’.” He asked softly, inspecting his posture.
He watched as Nick cracked one eye open and look over at Greg through his eyelashes with a soft smile, “You could never really figure out the ‘moves’ could you?”
“Well not all of us spent every Sunday of our childhood learning them that’s for sure.” Greg shot back quickly with a small chuckle before falling silent and bowing his head.
“You don’t have to do that Greg, just because I am. I’m done anyway.” Nick commented straightening to sit back on the pew bench.
Greg brought his head back up, “Yes I do.” He said simply.
“Why?” Nick whispered.
“Because it’s important to you, and therefore important to me. Besides, the power of two is always better then the power of one anyway.” Greg shrugged.
“Where’s Isabelle?” Nick asked.
“With my parents.” Greg answered and Nick nodded, “He’s in surgery.” Again Nick nodded, “You do…realize why I hesitated right?” He asked.
“Of course I do.” Nick sighed, “I just don’t understand how you can think that consenting to life saving surgery for your son is the same as what happened with Dimetrius James.”
“No you wouldn’t.” Greg whispered, “It just is okay? You not understanding it isn’t going to keep me from feeling it.”
Nick nodded at a lose for how to respond so instead he changed his tact, “Grissom gave me the week off work. We’re going to need both of us to juggle home and here. Isabelle should be ready to go home at any time.” Greg nodded, “Greg…”
“You know what?” Greg cut him off softly, “I want to learn what’s so tranquil about this place. I mean I know its quiet, but is that it?”
Nick shrugged, “Sort of. It’s hard to explain. It’s whatever you want it to be.”
Greg nodded, “Okay.” He whispered reaching to grab Nick’s hand and holding it in his, laying his head back against the pew and closing his eyes. Nick watched him for a while before bringing the hand he held in his to his mouth and kissing it. The move caused a soft smile to spread across Greg’s feature and Nick smiled himself, leaning back against the pew and also closing his eyes.
-- -- --
Greg nervously bounced his knee, which was amusing Angelica who sat upon it, in the waiting room several hours later. He looked across the waiting room to watch Nick and Aidan play what felt like their hundredth game of tic-tac-toe while Charlie sat on Nick’s other side amusing himself with a toy truck he’d brought from home.
Isabelle snorted to Greg’s left and he looked over to find her fast asleep in her car seat chair, her pink jumper a stark contrast to the white cushion she lay on. Nick would take her, Angelica, Charlie and Aidan home as soon as word had came on Austin and Greg would take care of everything pertaining to him before going home himself. He would have loved to be there for the first moments of Isabelle at home but he had responsibilities at the hospital. If everything worked his way he would get to experience Austin’s first moments home.
Charlie hopped off his chair, leaving his truck behind and walked over to the car seat next to Greg. He stood in front of it quietly for a moment and Greg watched him from the corner of his eye. Charlie then reached a hand out and grabbed Isabelle’s balled hand in his, rubbing the back softly before hopping up on the seat next to her and proceeding to kick his feet absently.
“Hey Charlie-man?” Greg asked and Charlie looked up with a questioning smile, “Why’d you do that?” He asked nodding towards the car seat where Charlie’s hand was still covering Isabelle’s.
Charlie shrugged, “I don’t want Isabelle to be sad.”
Greg smiled and looked over at Nick who had heard the exchange and was looking over and smiling as well, “I think you’re cheering her up Char.” Greg said softly and Charlie smiled, proud of himself.
The door to the waiting room opened and five heads turned its way. A surgeon looking haggard walked through, removing a surgical mask. To Greg it seemed like a very stereotypical situation.
Nick and Greg each stood up, Greg bringing Angelica to rest on his hip, “Mr. Sanders. Mr. Stokes.” The surgeon shook Nick’s hand with a nod and nodded to Greg who currently had his hands full, “My name is Dr. Addison Montgomery and I’m the attending surgeon on your son’s case.”
“It’s nice to meet you. How’d the surgery go?” Nick asked resting a hand on Greg’s lower back as he put down a squirming Angelica so she could stand by his legs.
Dr. Montgomery gave a lopsided smile at the look of panic on the faces of the men in front of her, “There is no need for those looks of panic gentlemen. Not to toot my own horn but I’m very good at what I do. Austin is in recovery, we were able to remove the section of his aorta that was too narrow and everything with his heart appears to be working just fine. We’ll have to keep him for the next while to ensure his lungs are fully developed and he heals nicely from the surgery but I would hazard a guess you have him home in a week or two.”
Nick immediately enveloped Greg into a hug and Greg buried his face Nick’s shoulder. Nick could feel his shirt getting slightly damp and couldn’t deny the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. When they pulled apart Dr. Montgomery was still standing by them, smiling at the favourite part of her job; telling a family good news, “Thank you.” Greg said, doubtful he could ever really express his feelings towards the woman who saved his son.
“All in a days work.” Dr. Montgomery smiled, “I can take you down to recovery if you wish. You won’t be able to go in the room due to sterilization reasons, but he should be moved back to the NICU room he was in before in a short while and until then you can look in through the window.”
“That would be great.” Nick nodded.
“Can we come?” Aidan asked joining the group with Charlie by his side.
“You sure can.” Dr. Montgomery nodded gesturing for the group to follow her.
Nick picked up Angelica and started to walk from the room but turned when Greg wasn’t following him, “Coming?” he asked.
Greg nodded and walked over to the car seat on the chair, kneeling in front of it and adjusting the blanket covering his daughter, “Come on Izzy, let’s go see your brother.” He whispered picking up the car seat and turning to follow Nick out of the room.
As Greg passed Dr. Montgomery leaving the room he turned and smirked at her, “You probably get told all the time its ironic your name is Addison Montgomery and you’re a baby surgeon?”
Dr. Montgomery laughed as she closed the door behind her, “Trust me, Grey’s Anatomy has done wonders for my career.”
TBC
A/N: Okay so here’s the deal. I’m THINKING of doing one or two more chapters of Fathers First and then ‘putting it to rest’. HOWEVER I have something else up my sleeve that I’ve been working on. So it’s the public’s decision I guess. I’m sure I could find more ideas for Fathers First or I can run with the ‘new’ thing. If I go with the ‘new’ thing I think you may find it’s not that much of a departure from Fathers First…that’s all I’m gonna say about it right now though. Let me know!
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-03-27 01:22 pm (UTC)I'm reading several long WIP's that haven't been updated in six months. It's really frustrating
no subject
Date: 2007-03-27 02:22 pm (UTC)As much as I'd love for this to go on forever, there's always a point where things should stop, so maybe do anothr couple of chapters just to finish it off, and start something new?
But yeah, up to you. I love your stories either way :)
no subject
Date: 2007-03-27 06:32 pm (UTC)thanks
no subject
Date: 2007-03-27 08:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-03-27 08:10 pm (UTC)Be very proud of this fic. You have made me laugh and cry.
lori
no subject
Date: 2007-03-27 08:47 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for your kind words. Its really something to hear that something you've written that makes you happy is also making others happy. Thanks again for reading!
no subject
Date: 2007-03-28 03:58 am (UTC)I've friended you btw, my name is Jon, nice to meet you ^^ I look forward to reading whatever you write.
no subject
Date: 2007-03-31 06:19 pm (UTC)You've got to let your muses rest. :) Just let us know, and I will always love reading about Aidan, Charlie, Jellie, Izzy, and austin; and especially their dads juggling it all. Good luck with the next ideas.