(no subject)
Sep. 6th, 2005 08:32 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
kayryn666.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
nickngregTitle: Close my Eyes
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kayryn666
Rating: PG-16 for mentions of sexual activity
Summary: He doesn't know how they got to this place.
Warnings: No big ones besides what it's rated for and a brief mention of Grave Danger (if you squint your eyes and tilt your head to the side). Mostly the story's about the emotions, so it's very non-graphic.
Word Count: 623. It's short.
Disclaimer: Don't own. I'm not making any money off of this little endeavor.
Author's Note: Thanks to the video thatserenity151979 made to the song "Someday" by Nickelback, I was struck by a plot bunny. Dedicated to her because her vid was the inspiration. Done in around twenty minutes with a quick read through, so as usual, if you see some glaring gramatical or spelling or character errors, please, let me know.
I don't know when it was that "we" became a "me" and "him". It could have been the kidnapping. It could have been the recuperation process. It could have been the numerous other trials that came after it. Hell, as far as I know, it could have been the squabble we had over the bathroom three weeks ago (although I'm sure we started falling apart quite a while before that).
Fact of the matter is I really don't know. All I know is that somewhere, somehow, the "us" that had held together through so much shit suddenly become a "no more". The worst part of it was that I don't think either of us noticed until Greg started sleeping in the spare room. And I think a part of me died in the moment I realized this.
He doesn't even know I'm here right now watching him sleep from the shelter of the doorway. He used to be so attuned to my presence that he'd at least stir if I was in the room.
Now, I seemed to be like a ghost to him. A fondly cherished memory. Something that he can put away in a box to look back on when feeling particularly nostalgic.
I loathe this feeling. This not knowing where I stand. Walking as stealthily as I can, I creep into the room and sit down on the bed. It's only now that he begins to stir.
"Mmmnngg... Nick?" he mutters, and I lean down and silence him with my mouth. And the most amazing thing is that he's kissing me back, and that he seems to be pouring everything he can into this one kiss, as if our complete future rests in this moment.
Maybe it does.
When we part, I find his eyes through the darkness that the blackout curtains provide. I'm surprised to see the most vulnerable, longing look there, and I immediately feel regret for putting that uncertainty there.
"Greg," I whisper, and suddenly he's in my arms, and I'm falling for him all over again, hard and fast. God, I missed this, and I can't believe we had fallen so far away from each other.
And all at once we're in my (our) bed and we're groping, and grinding, and arching, and gasping, and kissing, and it's fast, it's passionate, it's hard, and I'm lost, and before I know it, we're laying together, spent, and he's clutching at me as if I'll disappear if he gives me the chance.
It takes me a little while to realize he's growling words in my ear, promises, and he's confessing his fear, his hopes, his dreams, as if I've never heard them before, and I realize that maybe I haven't, maybe I haven't really heard them, because if I had, then maybe we wouldn't have gotten to this place, this desolate wasteland, where we have nothing but hope left, a hope that’s waning. And I feel shame in myself for this, for not taking the time to notice him, for being so caught up, and I almost miss his most recent muttered confession.
"Thing is, I love you Nicky. Even if you did something horrible to me, I don't think I'd be able to move on. And I hate this feeling, but it feels so right and I was so scared Nick. So scared..." and gods, had I really done this to him?
So I hold him, and tell him it's okay, we'll make this work, make sure we never reach this point again, and he's pleased, and soon he's falling asleep, and I smile, because tonight, I can tell, will be the first night in a while that I'll finally be able to actually rest once I close my eyes.
Author:
kayryn666Rating: PG-16 for mentions of sexual activity
Summary: He doesn't know how they got to this place.
Warnings: No big ones besides what it's rated for and a brief mention of Grave Danger (if you squint your eyes and tilt your head to the side). Mostly the story's about the emotions, so it's very non-graphic.
Word Count: 623. It's short.
Disclaimer: Don't own. I'm not making any money off of this little endeavor.
Author's Note: Thanks to the video that
serenity151979 made to the song "Someday" by Nickelback, I was struck by a plot bunny. Dedicated to her because her vid was the inspiration. Done in around twenty minutes with a quick read through, so as usual, if you see some glaring gramatical or spelling or character errors, please, let me know.I don't know when it was that "we" became a "me" and "him". It could have been the kidnapping. It could have been the recuperation process. It could have been the numerous other trials that came after it. Hell, as far as I know, it could have been the squabble we had over the bathroom three weeks ago (although I'm sure we started falling apart quite a while before that).
Fact of the matter is I really don't know. All I know is that somewhere, somehow, the "us" that had held together through so much shit suddenly become a "no more". The worst part of it was that I don't think either of us noticed until Greg started sleeping in the spare room. And I think a part of me died in the moment I realized this.
He doesn't even know I'm here right now watching him sleep from the shelter of the doorway. He used to be so attuned to my presence that he'd at least stir if I was in the room.
Now, I seemed to be like a ghost to him. A fondly cherished memory. Something that he can put away in a box to look back on when feeling particularly nostalgic.
I loathe this feeling. This not knowing where I stand. Walking as stealthily as I can, I creep into the room and sit down on the bed. It's only now that he begins to stir.
"Mmmnngg... Nick?" he mutters, and I lean down and silence him with my mouth. And the most amazing thing is that he's kissing me back, and that he seems to be pouring everything he can into this one kiss, as if our complete future rests in this moment.
Maybe it does.
When we part, I find his eyes through the darkness that the blackout curtains provide. I'm surprised to see the most vulnerable, longing look there, and I immediately feel regret for putting that uncertainty there.
"Greg," I whisper, and suddenly he's in my arms, and I'm falling for him all over again, hard and fast. God, I missed this, and I can't believe we had fallen so far away from each other.
And all at once we're in my (our) bed and we're groping, and grinding, and arching, and gasping, and kissing, and it's fast, it's passionate, it's hard, and I'm lost, and before I know it, we're laying together, spent, and he's clutching at me as if I'll disappear if he gives me the chance.
It takes me a little while to realize he's growling words in my ear, promises, and he's confessing his fear, his hopes, his dreams, as if I've never heard them before, and I realize that maybe I haven't, maybe I haven't really heard them, because if I had, then maybe we wouldn't have gotten to this place, this desolate wasteland, where we have nothing but hope left, a hope that’s waning. And I feel shame in myself for this, for not taking the time to notice him, for being so caught up, and I almost miss his most recent muttered confession.
"Thing is, I love you Nicky. Even if you did something horrible to me, I don't think I'd be able to move on. And I hate this feeling, but it feels so right and I was so scared Nick. So scared..." and gods, had I really done this to him?
So I hold him, and tell him it's okay, we'll make this work, make sure we never reach this point again, and he's pleased, and soon he's falling asleep, and I smile, because tonight, I can tell, will be the first night in a while that I'll finally be able to actually rest once I close my eyes.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-09-07 04:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-07 08:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-07 09:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-07 08:33 pm (UTC)& well written<3
well done.
:)
x
no subject
Date: 2005-09-07 09:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-11 02:05 pm (UTC)ctx :D