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nickngregTitle: Baby Steps: Into the Fire
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Don't own them, don't sue me
A/N: Thanks so much to Godgaleshot and Fred_bear for their patient, subtle and insightful beta-ing. And to Helena_eternal for keeping the pressure on.
Warning: The epic continues: bring food and drink or print out and take a bath. I've warned you.
Greg drove to Nick's house when he got off work. Even though they'd really connected the night before, he still felt off balance and didn't know what to expect when he came face to face with Nick again. Nick had been acting so erratic and volatile since the abduction. Greg's heart sank when he drove up and saw Nick setting his, Greg's, bags on the front porch. He got out of his car slowly, wondering how he was going to deal with this. Was Nick kicking him out? Maybe Nick just needed some space right now but Greg needed to be around Nick where he could touch him and reassure himself that Nick was safely above ground.
Nick glanced up and found a scared-looking Greg. He smiled at him and said, "Hey, babe. How was work?"
"What are you doing?" Greg burst out, "I thought… I mean…"
"Whoa, whoa, hold your horses," Nick grinned, "We're going on a little trip."
Greg's brain screeched to a halt while the gears clashed, "A trip?"
"Yep, and we gotta take off for the airport in about fifteen. I packed your stuff and I think I got everything you'll need. So go inside and ditch your work stuff. You can get changed while I water the plants."
"Plants?" Greg was confused. A trip? And did they even have plants? He followed Nick into the house, "Nick, I can't just go, I have to work–" Suddenly he found himself backed up against the front door while Nick kissed him thoroughly and enthusiastically.
"Go get ready, I'll explain on the way to the airport. You've got about fifteen minutes." Nick licked Greg's neck, grinning at Greg's appreciative shudder. "C'mon, shake a leg there, man." He spun away to the kitchen.
"Wait, Nick, do we have plants?"
"Nope, just a ruse to get you inside so I could kiss you," Nick called back at him.
"I didn't think we did," Greg muttered and ran for the bedroom, shucking his work clothes and pulling on an old t-shirt, jeans, sneakers and a jacket. He hit the bathroom, making sure Nick had packed his toothbrush and hair gel. While he was in there he sneaked a look in the drawer that usually held the condoms and lube and noticed they were gone. He smiled as Nick grabbed his arm and started dragging him out to the truck.
"Wait a minute, Nick. I have to work, I at least have to call Grissom and tell him that I'm taking some days off, wait, how many days off am I taking?" Nick snickered as he watched Greg looking cute as he got all flustered. Usually Greg welcomed what little spontaneity Nick came up with and here he was acting like a distracted little old lady who lost her cat.
"Relax, man," Nick laughed, "I cleared it with Grissom. He knows you're not coming in."
"You told – You told Grissom – that I wasn't coming in – to work?" Greg sputtered.
"You act like I can't use a phone," Nick pouted.
"This isn't about…using a phone! You asked for vacation time for me and you must have told Grissom you were surprising me." Greg remembered Grissom telling him to have a good time and at the time it didn't even register because it made no sense. "I mean… I mean… does he know?"
"Does now," grinned Nick cheerfully.
"Gee," Greg moaned as he sank lower in the seat, his hands pressed to his flushed face. "I thought we were going to take baby steps. How did we go from listing me as first contact on your medical card to you outing us to Grissom without even telling me?"
"You're not mad, are you?" Nick sounded a little anxious. "I thought it would make you happy."
"It does. It does!" Greg sprang at Nick and tried to hug and kiss him.
"Not while I'm driving!" Nick yelped in alarm as he swerved into another lane.
"Okay, okay," Greg panted, "Calming down now, getting it under control, acting like a grown up, you know you can do it." He fanned his flushed face with his hands. "Um, do I wanna know where we're going?"
"The big and beautiful state of Texas," Nick gulped. That was the big one, bigger than telling Grissom and getting vacation time for Greg or putting the whole trip together in one day.
"The big… are we…," Greg swallowed hard, "Are we going to your parents'?"
"Yep."
"Oh, no," Greg groaned and held his head in his hands. He thought he could feel a headache starting and hoped he could be desperately ill while they were there and stay hidden in bed for the whole visit.
"What, G? You know they're going to love you. You said yourself, no one can resist the Sanders Charm." Nick was a little concerned at Greg's reaction. He needed Greg to be there, but he really didn't want to freak Greg out. Maybe he shouldn't have decided to surprise him, but when he got the idea, he just plowed straight ahead.
"Nicky, the whole time I was around your parents, I must have commented on the weather about fifty times. And the weather doesn't change much in Las Vegas, so they probably think I have some weird meteorological fetish," Greg groaned. "And you're dragging me down there to come out to them and they have no time to take that in and they get me shoved down their throats as a bonus."
Nick paused to think about what Greg said. "I think things will be OK, Greg," he said quietly. "I don't think I could do this without you. I'm not doing it for you, I'm doing it for me, for us, but I need you there. I want them to like you but if they don't it won't make any difference to me. You know that."
"Yeah, I guess I do." For the first time, Greg relaxed a bit, "At least if you're having a hard time I can distract them with goofy behavior." He did the silly monkey face with appropriate sound effects.
"I don't think that'll be necessary, G," laughed Nick.
____
During the four and half hour flight to Austin, Greg alternated between excited and nervous. Nick was amused at his mood swings but he could see Greg wasn't going to get a nap before they got there. To distract him, Nick asked him how he'd come out to his parents.
Greg calmed down. "I didn't have to. They knew before I did."
"How does that go, then?" asked Nick.
"Well, the time came for 'THE TALK' about sex. Like I hadn't already learned all about it from my friends. Did you ever wonder why parents do the 'THE TALK'? I mean, they don't tell you anything useful. 'The sperm fertilizes the egg…' Where is the egg? How does the sperm get there, motorcycle?" Greg continued, "Why don't they tell you what it feels like when your hormones start break dancing on the head of your dick. Why don't they tell you when you see a cute guy your dick is going to take off after him and drag you along for the ride?"
"I get it, G. You irritated the hell out of them during 'THE TALK', didn't you?" Nick grinned.
"Well, yes, I did," confessed Greg. "But I mean, I already knew the four letter words, I knew the basic mechanics, and I wasn't all that interested in hearing about how men and women did it."
"So what happened?"
"My father said, 'You're not interested in hearing this, are you?'" Greg looked out the window. "Then he handed me a piece of paper listing government websites with information on AIDS and safe sex. He said, 'You're a smart kid, find out what you can to keep yourself safe.' I knew they were proud of me. Proud that I was smart and that I got good grades. But they weren't very touchy feely. They were both very intellectual. We 'discussed' things at dinner."
"I'm sorry, Greg," Nick murmured. "That's really… kinda cold."
"Yeah, I guess." Greg paused and then cheered up. "But look on the bright side, I also found gay porn on the internet and that was educational."
____
Nick turned the rental truck in at the gates of the Stokes ranch. Greg was quiet as he took in the iron gate arched over the driveway with the name Stokes worked into it. The drive was lined with fencing that had cattle on one side and some horses grazing on the other.
"You never told me how big it was, Nicky. Did you grow up here?"
"Everything's bigger in Texas, boy." Nick grinned. "Yeah, this is where it all took place. It was great growing up on a ranch, riding and running around. Lots of places to play and hide out."
"Wow," murmured Greg. He tried to picture a little Nicky running up the drive in the sun, wearing jean cut-offs, a striped t-shirt, cowboy boots and a little cowboy hat. Maybe with a toy six shooter in a gun belt and a rope looped at his waist. And maybe a few of his sisters running with him, all of them shrieking with laughter and the wind blowing in their hair.
Nick stopped the truck in front of the house and honked the horn. As they got out and gathered their bags, Nick's mother and father came out on the front porch to greet them. They both hugged Nick at the same time and for a moment they all stood still in that embrace. Then Bill Stokes came over and started shaking Greg's hand with warmth in his eyes. Nick said, "You remember my friend, Greg, from the hospital?"
"Of course we do," and Jillian Stokes hugged Greg, rendering him speechless for the second time in an hour.
Bill Stokes picked up one of Nick's bags and put an arm around Nick, telling him some news about the ranch while they went inside and up the stairs. Greg picked up his bags and looked anxiously at Jillian. "Come with me, Greg, we've put you in the guest room. I'll show you the way. It has an attached bathroom and I think you'll find everything you need, but if you don't, you be sure to let me know, okay?" Jillian went upstairs and turned in the opposite direction Nick was heading in. She checked the bathroom for towels and opened a window, "I expect you'd like to unpack and check in with Nicky. We'll be downstairs. Join us for a drink whenever you're ready." She smiled and left the room, closing the door behind her.
After Greg unpacked, he cautiously opened his door and went down the hall to find Nick. He paused at the open door of a room with red cowboy curtains, a single bed, lots of books and trophies and Nick looking out of the window. Greg said, "Hey, Cowboy."
Nick looked over and smiled, "Are you ready for Texas chili? I'm afraid it's pretty hot. But my brother and sisters won't be here till Friday, so they're saving the barbecue for then."
Greg smiled weakly and followed Nick downstairs. Oh Lord, Nick never mentioned his siblings were coming. Just shut up and go with the flow, Greg instructed himself.
During dinner, Nick, Bill and Jillian kept up a brisk discussion on the judicial system and law enforcement in general. Seeing as Bill had been a D.A. and was a judge, that Jillian was a public defender and Nick used to be a cop, they pretty much had all sides corralled. Greg listened. At one point when it got a little quiet Greg was inspired to say, "Gee, the sky is so nice and clear here. Not like the smog in Vegas." Realizing what he'd said, he shut up as he flushed a rosy red. Nick's shoulders shook silently as he gazed into his bowl of chili and bit his lips, then he said, "Greg came directly from work. He hasn't had any sleep in about 20 hours. Maybe he should get some rest."
Blushing, Greg thanked Jillian for dinner and escaped from the dining room.
––––
There was the smell of burning plastic. He turned to see what was wrong. Suddenly there was a flash of light that hurt his eyes and he heard himself yelp as he crashed through the glass window. He felt a slash of burning pain on his back. He looked around and wondered why he couldn't hear anything. Things got black and he sank into a pool of liquid, wishing he had the strength to crawl away. When he opened his eyes the world was sideways and slipping around. He couldn't hear anything, he couldn't feel anything. People wearing moving masks peered at him and poked him. He felt the burning pain all over as he was scrubbed and then the ripping pain started on his back. He passed out again. He was digging. Nick was under there, he knew it and he had to get him out. He was scrabbling at the dirt with his bloody hands. Grissom, Catherine, Warrick, Sara, Brass and Nick's parents stood watching him and told him that he wasn't digging fast enough and that it would be his fault if Nick died. He dug and his hands sank into rotting flesh, the decaying body of a dog. The smell… Then another one and he didn't know where Nick…
Greg cried out and shot up sweating and shaking. He didn't know where he was. The room was unfamiliar but there was a nightlight shining from the bathroom. He hoped he could make it. He staggered into the bathroom and fell to his knees, crashing onto the tile floor. Clutching the toilet seat, he threw up violently, retching repeatedly even after he'd emptied his stomach. Gasping for breath, he reached up and flushed. His head hung over the bowl as his insides twisted and roiled. He panted for breath and tried to use the relaxation techniques they'd given him in therapy. His hands shook even as he gripped at the toilet bowl.
Suddenly he felt a cool wet washcloth placed gently on the back of his neck. "Thanks, Nick," he whispered.
"You're very welcome," came a feminine voice that wasn't Nick's at all.
Greg looked up, panic flaring in his eyes as he saw Jillian Stokes. He moaned and curled up on the floor, covering his mouth with the washcloth.
Jillian settled on the floor next to him, leaning back against the tub. She was dressed in cotton pj bottoms with horses on them and a Dixie Chicks T-shirt. Greg suddenly remembered he was in boxers and a T-shirt, both soaking wet with his sweat and that small humiliation eclipsed the greater embarrassment that he'd just accidentally outed Nick to his mother. He groaned again.
"I hope it wasn't my dinner that upset you," came Jillian's soft voice. She reached out with cool hands and touched his forehead. "Are you still nauseous, honey?
"Uh, yeah," Greg said weakly.
"Hang on, I'll be right back."
Greg tried to pull himself up from the floor but he still had the shakes from the violent bout of sickness.
Jillian came back with a Coke and a light blanket. She set them down and sat down against the tub again. "I'm going to help you up, okay? Are you ready to sit up?"
Greg nodded and she put her arms around him and helped him sit back against the tub. He crunched himself into as small a ball as he could, hugging his knees, while trying to avoid looking at her.
She popped the top of the Coke can and handed it to him. "Here, drink this. It'll settle your stomach and you'll feel better."
Greg was silent, caught between the sickness that came with the nightmare and worry that Mrs. Stokes was taking care of him only to get him in good health before she killed him and hid the body.
"How come you got sick?" Jillian asked as she draped the blanket around his shoulders. "Here, lean forward a minute so I can get this behind you."
Greg obediently leaned forward and felt relief in the warmth.
"Um, it wasn't your dinner, Mrs. Stokes," he said softly.
"You may call me Jillian," she smiled, "Or even Mom if you prefer."
Greg's eyes widened as he looked at her.
"You look like a deer caught in headlights," came her slow, honeyed voice, the accent just like Nick's. "So tell me why you got sick and I'll tell you why you can call me Mom," she added teasingly.
"It was… just a nightmare. Sometimes when they're bad, I get sick," explained Greg.
"What was the nightmare about, do you remember," she asked.
"It started with the explosion. There was an explosion at the lab–"
"Yes, Nicky told us about that. You were burned and were in the hospital for a while. He was very concerned about you. And he was proud that you were brave enough to go back to work." Jillian looked at him kindly.
"Nick… told you… about…" Greg faltered.
"He talks about you a lot," she nodded. "You're very important to him. And so we're most happy you were able to come with him to visit. We love anyone he loves."
Greg shook his head. He was never at his best after a nightmare but this was way confusing.
"So, the nightmare?" Jillian prompted him.
"Right, so, first the explosion, then the hospital and the burn unit." Greg stopped uncomfortably. He hated talking about the treatments. He'd never felt so helpless in his life except once and he hated that feeling.
"Then Nicky being buried?" Jillian asked softly.
"Yes." Greg said abruptly. "I dig for him and no one helps me. And I can't find him and…it's my fault… it's so terrifying and I try to wake up but I can't until… I can't tell you the rest. I don't want to upset you."
"Yes, Bill and I knew you were very upset when we met you at the hospital. You weren't sleeping well, you were sneaking in late at night to be with Nicky, and you never talked, except about the weather." She chuckled, "We really were beginning to wonder if you could talk, but Nicky assured us you could." She sobered a bit. "We were so happy to see Nicky has someone who loves him as much as you do."
Greg shook his head. He pinched his arm, wincing. He grabbed his head and rubbed it. "I'm going to wake up soon. I'm going to find myself naked in the lab presenting evidence to Grissom and everyone will be laughing at me. How did this get added onto my nightmare?" he muttered.
Jillian laughed, "You're awake, honey, and it's not polite to call a lady a nightmare."
Greg glared at her and said accusingly, "You know? You know!"
Jillian smiled in amusement, "We've always known, dear. We've just been waiting for Nicky to feel comfortable enough to tell us."
"He's been so scared of disappointing you, you and your husband, for years and you laugh–" Greg burst out.
"Oh, Greg, sweetie, I'm not laughing at him," Jillian sighed. "We don't force confidences from our children. We want them to feel like they can come to us," she paused looking sadly at Greg. "I've always known something happened to Nicky when he was a child, but I never knew what it was. He changed after that, he was so scared, always trying to be so good." She took in a shaky breath. "It's so hard to see your children hurt. And we were afraid and so we didn't want to push him. We were afraid we'd push him right out of our lives," she paused. "I know now that we didn't handle it right, but you can only do the best you can with what you know. When you know more, you do better."
"He's been so scared and angry, so upset about what his father would say–" Greg paused.
"Well, his father wasn't very happy when he first realized Nicky was gay. But he came to terms with it. He just knows that life isn't easy for gay men, especially in law enforcement. And after some of the cases we've seen in our line of work, well, we don't want Nicky to have those kinds of things happen to him," she sighed. "Or to you. But Nicky has to choose his own way and we have to let him," she said with a lovely smile.
"Wow," Greg relaxed back against the tub. "So you don't mind, you love him anyway?"
"Of course," Jillian said simply. "Now why don't you get into some dry clothes and I'll make some coffee. Would you like some?"
"Always," said Greg promptly.
“I know you’re not used to sleeping alone and as soon as Nick tells us about you…you won’t have to.” Jillian laughed as she stood and gave him a hand up, "And you'll be glad to know that Nicky entrusted me with some of your Blue Hawaiian, so you'll get your favorite."
Greg flashed a genuine smile at her and hurried into his room to change.
tbc
Chapter 1 here
Chapter 2 here
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Don't own them, don't sue me
A/N: Thanks so much to Godgaleshot and Fred_bear for their patient, subtle and insightful beta-ing. And to Helena_eternal for keeping the pressure on.
Warning: The epic continues: bring food and drink or print out and take a bath. I've warned you.
Greg drove to Nick's house when he got off work. Even though they'd really connected the night before, he still felt off balance and didn't know what to expect when he came face to face with Nick again. Nick had been acting so erratic and volatile since the abduction. Greg's heart sank when he drove up and saw Nick setting his, Greg's, bags on the front porch. He got out of his car slowly, wondering how he was going to deal with this. Was Nick kicking him out? Maybe Nick just needed some space right now but Greg needed to be around Nick where he could touch him and reassure himself that Nick was safely above ground.
Nick glanced up and found a scared-looking Greg. He smiled at him and said, "Hey, babe. How was work?"
"What are you doing?" Greg burst out, "I thought… I mean…"
"Whoa, whoa, hold your horses," Nick grinned, "We're going on a little trip."
Greg's brain screeched to a halt while the gears clashed, "A trip?"
"Yep, and we gotta take off for the airport in about fifteen. I packed your stuff and I think I got everything you'll need. So go inside and ditch your work stuff. You can get changed while I water the plants."
"Plants?" Greg was confused. A trip? And did they even have plants? He followed Nick into the house, "Nick, I can't just go, I have to work–" Suddenly he found himself backed up against the front door while Nick kissed him thoroughly and enthusiastically.
"Go get ready, I'll explain on the way to the airport. You've got about fifteen minutes." Nick licked Greg's neck, grinning at Greg's appreciative shudder. "C'mon, shake a leg there, man." He spun away to the kitchen.
"Wait, Nick, do we have plants?"
"Nope, just a ruse to get you inside so I could kiss you," Nick called back at him.
"I didn't think we did," Greg muttered and ran for the bedroom, shucking his work clothes and pulling on an old t-shirt, jeans, sneakers and a jacket. He hit the bathroom, making sure Nick had packed his toothbrush and hair gel. While he was in there he sneaked a look in the drawer that usually held the condoms and lube and noticed they were gone. He smiled as Nick grabbed his arm and started dragging him out to the truck.
"Wait a minute, Nick. I have to work, I at least have to call Grissom and tell him that I'm taking some days off, wait, how many days off am I taking?" Nick snickered as he watched Greg looking cute as he got all flustered. Usually Greg welcomed what little spontaneity Nick came up with and here he was acting like a distracted little old lady who lost her cat.
"Relax, man," Nick laughed, "I cleared it with Grissom. He knows you're not coming in."
"You told – You told Grissom – that I wasn't coming in – to work?" Greg sputtered.
"You act like I can't use a phone," Nick pouted.
"This isn't about…using a phone! You asked for vacation time for me and you must have told Grissom you were surprising me." Greg remembered Grissom telling him to have a good time and at the time it didn't even register because it made no sense. "I mean… I mean… does he know?"
"Does now," grinned Nick cheerfully.
"Gee," Greg moaned as he sank lower in the seat, his hands pressed to his flushed face. "I thought we were going to take baby steps. How did we go from listing me as first contact on your medical card to you outing us to Grissom without even telling me?"
"You're not mad, are you?" Nick sounded a little anxious. "I thought it would make you happy."
"It does. It does!" Greg sprang at Nick and tried to hug and kiss him.
"Not while I'm driving!" Nick yelped in alarm as he swerved into another lane.
"Okay, okay," Greg panted, "Calming down now, getting it under control, acting like a grown up, you know you can do it." He fanned his flushed face with his hands. "Um, do I wanna know where we're going?"
"The big and beautiful state of Texas," Nick gulped. That was the big one, bigger than telling Grissom and getting vacation time for Greg or putting the whole trip together in one day.
"The big… are we…," Greg swallowed hard, "Are we going to your parents'?"
"Yep."
"Oh, no," Greg groaned and held his head in his hands. He thought he could feel a headache starting and hoped he could be desperately ill while they were there and stay hidden in bed for the whole visit.
"What, G? You know they're going to love you. You said yourself, no one can resist the Sanders Charm." Nick was a little concerned at Greg's reaction. He needed Greg to be there, but he really didn't want to freak Greg out. Maybe he shouldn't have decided to surprise him, but when he got the idea, he just plowed straight ahead.
"Nicky, the whole time I was around your parents, I must have commented on the weather about fifty times. And the weather doesn't change much in Las Vegas, so they probably think I have some weird meteorological fetish," Greg groaned. "And you're dragging me down there to come out to them and they have no time to take that in and they get me shoved down their throats as a bonus."
Nick paused to think about what Greg said. "I think things will be OK, Greg," he said quietly. "I don't think I could do this without you. I'm not doing it for you, I'm doing it for me, for us, but I need you there. I want them to like you but if they don't it won't make any difference to me. You know that."
"Yeah, I guess I do." For the first time, Greg relaxed a bit, "At least if you're having a hard time I can distract them with goofy behavior." He did the silly monkey face with appropriate sound effects.
"I don't think that'll be necessary, G," laughed Nick.
____
During the four and half hour flight to Austin, Greg alternated between excited and nervous. Nick was amused at his mood swings but he could see Greg wasn't going to get a nap before they got there. To distract him, Nick asked him how he'd come out to his parents.
Greg calmed down. "I didn't have to. They knew before I did."
"How does that go, then?" asked Nick.
"Well, the time came for 'THE TALK' about sex. Like I hadn't already learned all about it from my friends. Did you ever wonder why parents do the 'THE TALK'? I mean, they don't tell you anything useful. 'The sperm fertilizes the egg…' Where is the egg? How does the sperm get there, motorcycle?" Greg continued, "Why don't they tell you what it feels like when your hormones start break dancing on the head of your dick. Why don't they tell you when you see a cute guy your dick is going to take off after him and drag you along for the ride?"
"I get it, G. You irritated the hell out of them during 'THE TALK', didn't you?" Nick grinned.
"Well, yes, I did," confessed Greg. "But I mean, I already knew the four letter words, I knew the basic mechanics, and I wasn't all that interested in hearing about how men and women did it."
"So what happened?"
"My father said, 'You're not interested in hearing this, are you?'" Greg looked out the window. "Then he handed me a piece of paper listing government websites with information on AIDS and safe sex. He said, 'You're a smart kid, find out what you can to keep yourself safe.' I knew they were proud of me. Proud that I was smart and that I got good grades. But they weren't very touchy feely. They were both very intellectual. We 'discussed' things at dinner."
"I'm sorry, Greg," Nick murmured. "That's really… kinda cold."
"Yeah, I guess." Greg paused and then cheered up. "But look on the bright side, I also found gay porn on the internet and that was educational."
____
Nick turned the rental truck in at the gates of the Stokes ranch. Greg was quiet as he took in the iron gate arched over the driveway with the name Stokes worked into it. The drive was lined with fencing that had cattle on one side and some horses grazing on the other.
"You never told me how big it was, Nicky. Did you grow up here?"
"Everything's bigger in Texas, boy." Nick grinned. "Yeah, this is where it all took place. It was great growing up on a ranch, riding and running around. Lots of places to play and hide out."
"Wow," murmured Greg. He tried to picture a little Nicky running up the drive in the sun, wearing jean cut-offs, a striped t-shirt, cowboy boots and a little cowboy hat. Maybe with a toy six shooter in a gun belt and a rope looped at his waist. And maybe a few of his sisters running with him, all of them shrieking with laughter and the wind blowing in their hair.
Nick stopped the truck in front of the house and honked the horn. As they got out and gathered their bags, Nick's mother and father came out on the front porch to greet them. They both hugged Nick at the same time and for a moment they all stood still in that embrace. Then Bill Stokes came over and started shaking Greg's hand with warmth in his eyes. Nick said, "You remember my friend, Greg, from the hospital?"
"Of course we do," and Jillian Stokes hugged Greg, rendering him speechless for the second time in an hour.
Bill Stokes picked up one of Nick's bags and put an arm around Nick, telling him some news about the ranch while they went inside and up the stairs. Greg picked up his bags and looked anxiously at Jillian. "Come with me, Greg, we've put you in the guest room. I'll show you the way. It has an attached bathroom and I think you'll find everything you need, but if you don't, you be sure to let me know, okay?" Jillian went upstairs and turned in the opposite direction Nick was heading in. She checked the bathroom for towels and opened a window, "I expect you'd like to unpack and check in with Nicky. We'll be downstairs. Join us for a drink whenever you're ready." She smiled and left the room, closing the door behind her.
After Greg unpacked, he cautiously opened his door and went down the hall to find Nick. He paused at the open door of a room with red cowboy curtains, a single bed, lots of books and trophies and Nick looking out of the window. Greg said, "Hey, Cowboy."
Nick looked over and smiled, "Are you ready for Texas chili? I'm afraid it's pretty hot. But my brother and sisters won't be here till Friday, so they're saving the barbecue for then."
Greg smiled weakly and followed Nick downstairs. Oh Lord, Nick never mentioned his siblings were coming. Just shut up and go with the flow, Greg instructed himself.
During dinner, Nick, Bill and Jillian kept up a brisk discussion on the judicial system and law enforcement in general. Seeing as Bill had been a D.A. and was a judge, that Jillian was a public defender and Nick used to be a cop, they pretty much had all sides corralled. Greg listened. At one point when it got a little quiet Greg was inspired to say, "Gee, the sky is so nice and clear here. Not like the smog in Vegas." Realizing what he'd said, he shut up as he flushed a rosy red. Nick's shoulders shook silently as he gazed into his bowl of chili and bit his lips, then he said, "Greg came directly from work. He hasn't had any sleep in about 20 hours. Maybe he should get some rest."
Blushing, Greg thanked Jillian for dinner and escaped from the dining room.
––––
There was the smell of burning plastic. He turned to see what was wrong. Suddenly there was a flash of light that hurt his eyes and he heard himself yelp as he crashed through the glass window. He felt a slash of burning pain on his back. He looked around and wondered why he couldn't hear anything. Things got black and he sank into a pool of liquid, wishing he had the strength to crawl away. When he opened his eyes the world was sideways and slipping around. He couldn't hear anything, he couldn't feel anything. People wearing moving masks peered at him and poked him. He felt the burning pain all over as he was scrubbed and then the ripping pain started on his back. He passed out again. He was digging. Nick was under there, he knew it and he had to get him out. He was scrabbling at the dirt with his bloody hands. Grissom, Catherine, Warrick, Sara, Brass and Nick's parents stood watching him and told him that he wasn't digging fast enough and that it would be his fault if Nick died. He dug and his hands sank into rotting flesh, the decaying body of a dog. The smell… Then another one and he didn't know where Nick…
Greg cried out and shot up sweating and shaking. He didn't know where he was. The room was unfamiliar but there was a nightlight shining from the bathroom. He hoped he could make it. He staggered into the bathroom and fell to his knees, crashing onto the tile floor. Clutching the toilet seat, he threw up violently, retching repeatedly even after he'd emptied his stomach. Gasping for breath, he reached up and flushed. His head hung over the bowl as his insides twisted and roiled. He panted for breath and tried to use the relaxation techniques they'd given him in therapy. His hands shook even as he gripped at the toilet bowl.
Suddenly he felt a cool wet washcloth placed gently on the back of his neck. "Thanks, Nick," he whispered.
"You're very welcome," came a feminine voice that wasn't Nick's at all.
Greg looked up, panic flaring in his eyes as he saw Jillian Stokes. He moaned and curled up on the floor, covering his mouth with the washcloth.
Jillian settled on the floor next to him, leaning back against the tub. She was dressed in cotton pj bottoms with horses on them and a Dixie Chicks T-shirt. Greg suddenly remembered he was in boxers and a T-shirt, both soaking wet with his sweat and that small humiliation eclipsed the greater embarrassment that he'd just accidentally outed Nick to his mother. He groaned again.
"I hope it wasn't my dinner that upset you," came Jillian's soft voice. She reached out with cool hands and touched his forehead. "Are you still nauseous, honey?
"Uh, yeah," Greg said weakly.
"Hang on, I'll be right back."
Greg tried to pull himself up from the floor but he still had the shakes from the violent bout of sickness.
Jillian came back with a Coke and a light blanket. She set them down and sat down against the tub again. "I'm going to help you up, okay? Are you ready to sit up?"
Greg nodded and she put her arms around him and helped him sit back against the tub. He crunched himself into as small a ball as he could, hugging his knees, while trying to avoid looking at her.
She popped the top of the Coke can and handed it to him. "Here, drink this. It'll settle your stomach and you'll feel better."
Greg was silent, caught between the sickness that came with the nightmare and worry that Mrs. Stokes was taking care of him only to get him in good health before she killed him and hid the body.
"How come you got sick?" Jillian asked as she draped the blanket around his shoulders. "Here, lean forward a minute so I can get this behind you."
Greg obediently leaned forward and felt relief in the warmth.
"Um, it wasn't your dinner, Mrs. Stokes," he said softly.
"You may call me Jillian," she smiled, "Or even Mom if you prefer."
Greg's eyes widened as he looked at her.
"You look like a deer caught in headlights," came her slow, honeyed voice, the accent just like Nick's. "So tell me why you got sick and I'll tell you why you can call me Mom," she added teasingly.
"It was… just a nightmare. Sometimes when they're bad, I get sick," explained Greg.
"What was the nightmare about, do you remember," she asked.
"It started with the explosion. There was an explosion at the lab–"
"Yes, Nicky told us about that. You were burned and were in the hospital for a while. He was very concerned about you. And he was proud that you were brave enough to go back to work." Jillian looked at him kindly.
"Nick… told you… about…" Greg faltered.
"He talks about you a lot," she nodded. "You're very important to him. And so we're most happy you were able to come with him to visit. We love anyone he loves."
Greg shook his head. He was never at his best after a nightmare but this was way confusing.
"So, the nightmare?" Jillian prompted him.
"Right, so, first the explosion, then the hospital and the burn unit." Greg stopped uncomfortably. He hated talking about the treatments. He'd never felt so helpless in his life except once and he hated that feeling.
"Then Nicky being buried?" Jillian asked softly.
"Yes." Greg said abruptly. "I dig for him and no one helps me. And I can't find him and…it's my fault… it's so terrifying and I try to wake up but I can't until… I can't tell you the rest. I don't want to upset you."
"Yes, Bill and I knew you were very upset when we met you at the hospital. You weren't sleeping well, you were sneaking in late at night to be with Nicky, and you never talked, except about the weather." She chuckled, "We really were beginning to wonder if you could talk, but Nicky assured us you could." She sobered a bit. "We were so happy to see Nicky has someone who loves him as much as you do."
Greg shook his head. He pinched his arm, wincing. He grabbed his head and rubbed it. "I'm going to wake up soon. I'm going to find myself naked in the lab presenting evidence to Grissom and everyone will be laughing at me. How did this get added onto my nightmare?" he muttered.
Jillian laughed, "You're awake, honey, and it's not polite to call a lady a nightmare."
Greg glared at her and said accusingly, "You know? You know!"
Jillian smiled in amusement, "We've always known, dear. We've just been waiting for Nicky to feel comfortable enough to tell us."
"He's been so scared of disappointing you, you and your husband, for years and you laugh–" Greg burst out.
"Oh, Greg, sweetie, I'm not laughing at him," Jillian sighed. "We don't force confidences from our children. We want them to feel like they can come to us," she paused looking sadly at Greg. "I've always known something happened to Nicky when he was a child, but I never knew what it was. He changed after that, he was so scared, always trying to be so good." She took in a shaky breath. "It's so hard to see your children hurt. And we were afraid and so we didn't want to push him. We were afraid we'd push him right out of our lives," she paused. "I know now that we didn't handle it right, but you can only do the best you can with what you know. When you know more, you do better."
"He's been so scared and angry, so upset about what his father would say–" Greg paused.
"Well, his father wasn't very happy when he first realized Nicky was gay. But he came to terms with it. He just knows that life isn't easy for gay men, especially in law enforcement. And after some of the cases we've seen in our line of work, well, we don't want Nicky to have those kinds of things happen to him," she sighed. "Or to you. But Nicky has to choose his own way and we have to let him," she said with a lovely smile.
"Wow," Greg relaxed back against the tub. "So you don't mind, you love him anyway?"
"Of course," Jillian said simply. "Now why don't you get into some dry clothes and I'll make some coffee. Would you like some?"
"Always," said Greg promptly.
“I know you’re not used to sleeping alone and as soon as Nick tells us about you…you won’t have to.” Jillian laughed as she stood and gave him a hand up, "And you'll be glad to know that Nicky entrusted me with some of your Blue Hawaiian, so you'll get your favorite."
Greg flashed a genuine smile at her and hurried into his room to change.
tbc
Chapter 1 here
Chapter 2 here
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Date: 2005-06-18 12:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-19 04:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-18 01:08 pm (UTC):D
I can't wait for Nick to tell his parents and siblings. I really want Greg to get his bed buddy back :D
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Date: 2005-06-19 04:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-18 01:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-19 04:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-18 03:00 pm (UTC)I actually like fics where Nick and his parents fight over him being gay (weird, ne? lol) but this is good too. Especially if it's well written and this sure is. So yeah, just lovely!
"Wait, Nick, do we have plants?"
"Nicky, the whole time I was around your parents, I must have commented on the weather about fifty times. And the weather doesn't change much in Las Vegas, so they probably think I have some weird meteorological fetish,"
"Why don't they tell you what it feels like when your hormones start break dancing on the head of your dick. Why don't they tell you when you see a cute guy your dick is going to take off after him and drag you along for the ride?"
At one point when it got a little quiet Greg was inspired to say, "Gee, the sky is so nice and clear here. Not like the smog in Vegas."
Those made me grin like a maniac!
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Date: 2005-06-19 04:47 pm (UTC)I like ones where Nick is all brave with his parents too, but these parents turned out different. Don't worry, Nick gets brave in the next chapter. Thank you!
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Date: 2005-06-19 07:29 pm (UTC)Can't wait for brave Nick! :D
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Date: 2005-06-18 03:33 pm (UTC)"Not while I'm driving!" Nick yelped in alarm as he swerved into another lane. - Lmao. I can so see that happening!
Hehe meteorological fetish, gay porn...this was such a good chapter. And Nick's mom coming to comfort Greg, lol. I'm glad they knew and accepted it. I wore a happy grin throughout this entire fic :D
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Date: 2005-06-19 04:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-18 04:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-19 04:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-18 04:29 pm (UTC)One of the best stories i've ever read!!!
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Date: 2005-06-19 04:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-18 04:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-19 04:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-19 01:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-19 04:55 pm (UTC)I really appreciate that you think it was beautiful. Words like that just make me so happy.
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Date: 2005-06-20 01:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-30 10:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-27 12:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-30 10:03 pm (UTC)