wasn't really planning on this but...
Jun. 7th, 2005 02:36 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
saebuffyboy.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
nickngregYou know the drill by now. Nicks Journal. Bad words and stuff.
A/N: this isn't something I had intended on doing, I did it out of my personal currosity and thought I'd share. The website mentioned is real, and all interpratations are from it with no interfierence from me. Not really ment to further the story, but it might.
My Pensive:
I haven't been sleeping well since my dream the other night. I refuse to talk to Greg about it. And he's really the only person I see regularly. Sure everyone from work stops by, but I don't want to bother them with shit like this. Since my appointment with the shrink isn't till later this week, Greg suggested I do some research on my dream myself. I told him I knew what it all ment, but he was persistant and threatened to sleep with clothes on if I didn't cooporate. I almost called his bluff, but figured what the hell right? So he recommended this website freakydreams.com you write down your dream in as much detail as you can remember and it tells you what different stuff means and here's what it told me.
Your Dream: This time I was awake when I was locked up and I wasn’t alone. Greg and I were in there together. And as I looked up there were my parents, shovels in hand throwing shovel fulls of dirt on top of us. No matter how loud I screamed or how much I begged. Or even how much I promised to be a good boy, and stop telling lies about how much the girls liked to touch me. Nothing I could say could stop them. I don’t even know if they could hear me, I mean I think they could. They just looked so upset and disappointed and sad. Behind them I could see Sara and Cath, and Warrick and Gil, and everyone else from work just watching. They all had the same disappointed look on their faces. When they faded from view I began to focus on Greg. He was unconscious, but breathing which was good. He was alive and we’d be able to save some oxygen because of his slow steady breaths. I felt around in the darkness for what I knew would be there. I cracked the first glow stick and cast a side long view at Greg. I reached over and grabbed his limp hand and held it until I matched my breath with his own. My other hand reaches for the tape recorder. I press play expecting to hear the voice of that sick fuck. But it’s not. And here’s where I get almost more disturbed than watching my parents throw shovels of dirt at my face. It’s Grissom. On the tape. He tells me that I have enough oxygen to last the both of us 4 hours. But there is enough oxygen for one person to last twice as long, and that they will dig us up in 7 hours. He tells me about the gun that I already know is lying next to my head. He informs me that there is only one bullet in it. And it’s time for me to make a choice. I can shoot Greg while he’s asleep and will never know the terror of waking up buried alive and having to live life with out me, but I’d have to live knowing that I killed the one person I ever truly loved to save my own life. Or I can shoot myself and be spared the pain of having to live with out Greg, and giving him a long life, but leave him with all horrid feelings that I’d be saving myself from. One of us dies or both of us dies and it’s my choice. And I’d better decide soon, because the longer we both breath the less likely it will be that even one of us will make it. Greg wakes up at that point and I start bawling like a fucking baby. I try to tell him that I have to choose either me or us. I know there’s no way I’d tell him that his death is even an option. But somehow he knows. He just knows. He looks at me. Or as much as he can look at me and says. “Nicky, sometimes we have to make choices. Sometimes we don’t think that there is much of one, but there is always a choice. Remember that night I made the choice to ask you out, and you made the choice to go with me. I know things haven’t gone exactly how you planned, and I wish I could make them better. I wish my choice hadn’t led us here, but it has. But Nicky, I’d make that choice a million times over.” With that he reached over and grabbed the gun. It was too small a space to struggle with him. And I begged him to stop. To not do it. But I could see him wrap his lips around the barrel of the gun like he’d done to my cock so many times before. With the barrel pressed against the roof of his mouth he say “I love you.” Than pulled the trigger.
1. Words like time: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like hand: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.
Words like dirt: If negative,unclean;if positive,fertility. Discovery of lost valuables.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like boy: Young power developing. Increase in the family.
Words like girls: Learning to be receptive. Happiness and tranquility.
Words like faces: Repair of self image. Vanity. Renewal. Part of identity ready for a make-over.
Words like limp: One-side. Need for balance in life.
Words like hand: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.
Words like hand: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.
Words like sick: Upset. Unwell. Part of yourself is ready to be healed.
Words like dirt: If negative,unclean;if positive,fertility. Discovery of lost valuables.
Words like face: Repair of self image. Vanity. Renewal. Part of identity ready for a make-over.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like gun: Violence. Aggression. Threat. Danger ahead.
Words like head: Intellect. Understanding. It denotes threatened misery and loss will be avoid by wise action.
Words like time: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like terror: Overpowering fear. Violence. Supremacy. Suffering from a loss of trust.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like pain: Sickness. Unhappiness. Conflict. There is a problem that hurts.
Words like leave: Changes approaching. Cold feelings.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like baby: Happiness. Rebirth. Trust.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like death: End of a cycle. Something is finally over.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like night: Darkness. Mystery. Unconscious contents. There is a mystery that you want to penetrate.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like times: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like gun: Violence. Aggression. Threat. Danger ahead.
Words like space: Transcendence. Power. Timeless.S eeking for a spiritual experience.
Words like lips: Message. Communication. You have many advantages and will have mastery over many matters.
Words like gun: Violence. Aggression. Threat. Danger ahead.
Words like cock: A dream about hearing a cock crow means great prosperity and good news. Cocks fighting means family quarrels and unexpected sorrow.
Words like times: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like roof: Protection. Covering. Ready to break free and expand your limitations.
Words like mouth: Nourishment. New attitudes. You will soon have news from interests you are anxious over.
I don't really know what the fuck to think after that. I mean it's just so dumb internet site, not any athority on dreams. I has no context from which to draw conslusions, it just plucks words and assigns them meanings. And it's a little freaky what some of them, if anyting on this site is true, could mean to me.
A/N: this isn't something I had intended on doing, I did it out of my personal currosity and thought I'd share. The website mentioned is real, and all interpratations are from it with no interfierence from me. Not really ment to further the story, but it might.
My Pensive:
I haven't been sleeping well since my dream the other night. I refuse to talk to Greg about it. And he's really the only person I see regularly. Sure everyone from work stops by, but I don't want to bother them with shit like this. Since my appointment with the shrink isn't till later this week, Greg suggested I do some research on my dream myself. I told him I knew what it all ment, but he was persistant and threatened to sleep with clothes on if I didn't cooporate. I almost called his bluff, but figured what the hell right? So he recommended this website freakydreams.com you write down your dream in as much detail as you can remember and it tells you what different stuff means and here's what it told me.
Your Dream: This time I was awake when I was locked up and I wasn’t alone. Greg and I were in there together. And as I looked up there were my parents, shovels in hand throwing shovel fulls of dirt on top of us. No matter how loud I screamed or how much I begged. Or even how much I promised to be a good boy, and stop telling lies about how much the girls liked to touch me. Nothing I could say could stop them. I don’t even know if they could hear me, I mean I think they could. They just looked so upset and disappointed and sad. Behind them I could see Sara and Cath, and Warrick and Gil, and everyone else from work just watching. They all had the same disappointed look on their faces. When they faded from view I began to focus on Greg. He was unconscious, but breathing which was good. He was alive and we’d be able to save some oxygen because of his slow steady breaths. I felt around in the darkness for what I knew would be there. I cracked the first glow stick and cast a side long view at Greg. I reached over and grabbed his limp hand and held it until I matched my breath with his own. My other hand reaches for the tape recorder. I press play expecting to hear the voice of that sick fuck. But it’s not. And here’s where I get almost more disturbed than watching my parents throw shovels of dirt at my face. It’s Grissom. On the tape. He tells me that I have enough oxygen to last the both of us 4 hours. But there is enough oxygen for one person to last twice as long, and that they will dig us up in 7 hours. He tells me about the gun that I already know is lying next to my head. He informs me that there is only one bullet in it. And it’s time for me to make a choice. I can shoot Greg while he’s asleep and will never know the terror of waking up buried alive and having to live life with out me, but I’d have to live knowing that I killed the one person I ever truly loved to save my own life. Or I can shoot myself and be spared the pain of having to live with out Greg, and giving him a long life, but leave him with all horrid feelings that I’d be saving myself from. One of us dies or both of us dies and it’s my choice. And I’d better decide soon, because the longer we both breath the less likely it will be that even one of us will make it. Greg wakes up at that point and I start bawling like a fucking baby. I try to tell him that I have to choose either me or us. I know there’s no way I’d tell him that his death is even an option. But somehow he knows. He just knows. He looks at me. Or as much as he can look at me and says. “Nicky, sometimes we have to make choices. Sometimes we don’t think that there is much of one, but there is always a choice. Remember that night I made the choice to ask you out, and you made the choice to go with me. I know things haven’t gone exactly how you planned, and I wish I could make them better. I wish my choice hadn’t led us here, but it has. But Nicky, I’d make that choice a million times over.” With that he reached over and grabbed the gun. It was too small a space to struggle with him. And I begged him to stop. To not do it. But I could see him wrap his lips around the barrel of the gun like he’d done to my cock so many times before. With the barrel pressed against the roof of his mouth he say “I love you.” Than pulled the trigger.
1. Words like time: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like hand: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.
Words like dirt: If negative,unclean;if positive,fertility. Discovery of lost valuables.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like boy: Young power developing. Increase in the family.
Words like girls: Learning to be receptive. Happiness and tranquility.
Words like faces: Repair of self image. Vanity. Renewal. Part of identity ready for a make-over.
Words like limp: One-side. Need for balance in life.
Words like hand: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.
Words like hand: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.
Words like sick: Upset. Unwell. Part of yourself is ready to be healed.
Words like dirt: If negative,unclean;if positive,fertility. Discovery of lost valuables.
Words like face: Repair of self image. Vanity. Renewal. Part of identity ready for a make-over.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like gun: Violence. Aggression. Threat. Danger ahead.
Words like head: Intellect. Understanding. It denotes threatened misery and loss will be avoid by wise action.
Words like time: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like terror: Overpowering fear. Violence. Supremacy. Suffering from a loss of trust.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like pain: Sickness. Unhappiness. Conflict. There is a problem that hurts.
Words like leave: Changes approaching. Cold feelings.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like up: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like baby: Happiness. Rebirth. Trust.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like death: End of a cycle. Something is finally over.
Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like night: Darkness. Mystery. Unconscious contents. There is a mystery that you want to penetrate.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like make: Feminine projection. Improved image. How do you want to be seeing in the outside world.
Words like times: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like gun: Violence. Aggression. Threat. Danger ahead.
Words like space: Transcendence. Power. Timeless.S eeking for a spiritual experience.
Words like lips: Message. Communication. You have many advantages and will have mastery over many matters.
Words like gun: Violence. Aggression. Threat. Danger ahead.
Words like cock: A dream about hearing a cock crow means great prosperity and good news. Cocks fighting means family quarrels and unexpected sorrow.
Words like times: Irreversible. Continuity. Arrival or departure of feelings. Organizing your inner self.
Words like roof: Protection. Covering. Ready to break free and expand your limitations.
Words like mouth: Nourishment. New attitudes. You will soon have news from interests you are anxious over.
I don't really know what the fuck to think after that. I mean it's just so dumb internet site, not any athority on dreams. I has no context from which to draw conslusions, it just plucks words and assigns them meanings. And it's a little freaky what some of them, if anyting on this site is true, could mean to me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}