Falling Up Part 9

[emi-h.livejournal.com]

Title: Falling Up
Rating: Overall fic is R
Warnings: Some Sexual Content in this Chapter
Summary for Part Nine: Greg freaks and Nick thinks
Spoilers: None

Parts One & Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six
Part Seven
Part Eight

Part Nine - Dealing

 

            For the first time in his life, Greg Sanders didn’t have the ability to say anything.  Nick had told him everything, starting from Grissom practically blackmailing Nick into going to breakfast with him all the way to Nick knocking on Greg’s door.  It was a lot to take in, a lot to process in his mind.  And even though he was trying not to, Greg was on the verge of freaking out.  Every fear he had felt about Grissom became a harsh reality with everything Nick had said.  While he was confident that he was a much better choice for Nick, he was afraid that his boyfriend might not see that and end up being hurt by Grissom again.  He felt that both he and Nick had made a lot of progress with their relationship and now Grissom wanted that to come to an end, wanted Nick to go running back into his arms, and Greg would be damned if he was going to stand on the sidelines and watch it happen.

 

            As if sensing Greg’s inner struggle, Nick said, “If you need to pace and rant, then do it.”  He gave Greg a lopsided smile when the younger man gaped at him.  “I know that’s how you deal with things.”

 

            Greg really didn’t want to freak out, but the invitation was too tempting.  “Before I start, I just want you to know that I’m mad, but not at you.”  He planted a kiss on Nick’s cheek, stood up and started pacing in front of the couch.  “Oh my god, I can’t believe him!  Grissom had his chance with you, then blew it, and now he wants to butt in when it’s my turn?  No way, not letting it happen, I am so going to kick his bug studying ass into next year.  He’s trying to get you back, all that stuff he said is probably just a ploy to mess with your mind, and make you all confused about how you feel about him and how you feel about me.  Then next time he’s with you he’s probably going to start dropping hints that I’m a bad boyfriend, as if he’s one to talk.  And before you know it you’re going to start believing that I’m an abusive bum that does drugs and Grissom is going to swoop in and save the day.  But I’m not going to let him win!” Greg stomped his foot to emphasis his point.

 

            He continued to walk up and down the length of the couch, muttering to himself and throwing his arms into the air every once in awhile.  Nick was starting to get a little dizzy from watching Greg and wondering what was going on in the other man’s mind.  Then Greg came to a halt in front of Nick and frowned a little.

 

            “You don’t … You don’t want to be with him, do you?  Do you still have feelings for him?”

 

            Reaching out and grabbing Greg’s hand, Nick laced their fingers together and answered, “I want to be with you.”

 

            “Good, cause I want to be with you too.”  There was a brief grin on Greg’s face, then it disappeared and a troubled look appeared.  “What are we going to do?  This won’t go away; I don’t think Grissom is going to give up on you and we see him every time we go to work.”

 

            “We’ll be professionals and keep doing our jobs like we always have.  I’ve done this before when he left me and I think we can do it too.  I know Grissom will be professional at work too and we’ll just avoid seeing himself outside of work for awhile.  He’ll get over me soon.”  His words and tone were confident, but Nick understood and felt the worry Greg was experiencing.

 

            Greg didn’t look convinced despite Nick’s best attempt.  “What if Grissom decides to fire me?  We wouldn’t see each other during work and he’d have you all to himself.  And when you’re least expecting it, he’s going to lure you into his creepy office and have his way with you in front of all of those bugs!”

 

            Nick shook his head, wondering how Greg came up with these scenarios.  “That’s not going to happen.  I know that Grissom puts work first before anything else and he knows that you’re one of the best lab techs he’s going to find in this area.  He wouldn’t leave the lab short handed with some trainee just because he has a crush on me.”

 

            “Nicky, I think it’s more than a crush.”  Nick opened his mouth to protest, but Greg cut him off, “Remember who was right about Grissom being jealous?  And you have to admit, Grissom wouldn’t go through all this trouble for a crush.”

 

            Nick relented.  “Yeah, I know, I just … I just feel bad for him.  I know how he feels, what it’s like to not be with the person you desire.  What makes it worse is that I’m the one causing all of this and whatever I do I’m going to hurt someone.”

 

            Greg’s frown deepened.  “This isn’t your fault.  You didn’t do any of this on purpose.  Sometimes these things happen and yeah, feelings will be hurt, but that’s life, Nicky, not everything goes the way we want it to.”

 

            The guilt in Nick’s heart didn’t yield at Greg’s words.  “I know that, I just don’t like knowing that I’m the reason why Gil is hurting.  You didn’t see him when he asked me why I’m in a relationship with you and never tried with him.  I’ve never seen him look so heartbroken before.”

 

            “Nicky, I don’t think Grissom has ever been heartbroken.”

 

            “You weren’t there when Ecklie took a can of bug spray to his ant farm!  The man was totally lost and heartbroken, and I made him feel worse than that.”

 

            “You can’t blame yourself for this, you might not have said anything, but he didn’t either!  And how could you have been able to tell if he had feelings for you?  Grissom is distant on one of his good days!”  The frustration Greg was feeling seeped into his voice and he regretted that he didn’t have better control because Nick didn’t try to make a reply.  

 

            “Hey, I’m not mad at you, Nicky.  It’s just that sometimes it can be a little hard to get through to you in the middle of one of your guilt trips.”  Nick unconsciously pouted at those words, but Greg knew he was forgiven.  Greg climbed back onto the couch, wrapping his arms around him.  Picking up Nick’s wrist, he carefully turned it so the underside was facing up.  “This is where he touched you, right?”

 

            Nick nodded and within a second Greg sealed his lips against that wrist.  He sucked at the skin, bit at it and stroked it with his tongue, and he found himself completely absorbed by the moans coming from Nick.  When he was finished with that spot there was a nice, large hickey covering Nick’s wrist.  But he wasn’t done; Greg latched his lips onto Nick’s throat and gently pushed Nick and himself into a horizontal position on the couch, settling himself on top of his boyfriend while being careful not to crush him.  Greg moved his way down to the shoulder and when Nick’s shirt got in the way of his lips, he literally tore it open.

 

            “I liked that shirt,” Nick said breathlessly as buttons went flying everywhere.

 

            “It wasn’t that great, trust me,” Greg muttered as he slid the shirt off Nick’s shoulders.  Then he attacked one nipple with his tongue and the other with his fingers.  His free hand skillfully undid the button and zipper of Nick’s jeans.  He then used both hands to hook his thumbs underneath the waistband of his boyfriend’s dark blue boxers.  Nick lifted his hips so Greg could take off the rest of his clothes, flushing a little at the fact that he was naked and Greg was still completely dressed.  Greg made no move to take off his own clothes and batted Nick’s hands away when he tried to do it for him.  Instead he was focused on pleasuring Nick with his mouth and hands.

 

            Greg’s hands roamed over Nick’s chest and stomach with his mouth trailing not far behind.  He made sure to nibble on Nick’s sides and to lightly ghost over the inside of his thighs.  He licked the light layer of sweat that had broken out on Nick’s body and softly blew his damp skin.  Every touch forced a new sound or word from the Texan’s mouth, though sometimes he couldn’t vocalize his pleasure but instead open his mouth in a silent scream while taking in ragged breaths of air.  Greg was fascinated by the way Nick’s muscles tensed and relaxed into certain touches, and aroused at the way Nick’s face twisted with pleasure when Greg slid a finger inside of him.  But he always avoided the spot where Nick wanted to be touched the most.  

 

            And all of a sudden, Greg stopped.

 

            “Oh god,” Nick groaned.  “Finish what you started!”

 

            Greg got off the couch and managed to pick up Nick in his arms.  “I will, but the couch isn’t going to be big enough for what I’m going to do to you.”  Nick wrapped his arms around Greg’s neck, a little weary of how his boyfriend was quivering under his weight.  By some miracle the lab tech made it all the way to the bedroom without dropping the man in his arms, though it was a close call.  After dumping Nick onto the bed, he stripped out of his clothes and joined his boyfriend, saying, “When I’m done with you the only thing you’ll be able to say is ‘don’t stop’ and ‘Greg’.”

 

            Greg was wrong.  When it was all said and done, Nick couldn’t say a thing.  Instead he trembled slightly from the aftermath of their love making as Greg held him and caressed the small of his back, while whispering soothing words to him.  He could feel Greg shaking a bit as well, they were both out of breath and exhausted from the experience.

 

            Pressing a kiss on Nick’s forehead, Greg murmured, “I love you, Nicky, god I love you.  Don’t ever doubt that.  I love you and I’m not going to standby and watch someone who has made you so miserable in the past try to take you from me.”

 

            “Greg, I –”

 

            “Sh, you don’t have to say anything.  Just go to sleep, you need it.”

 

            “Greg…”

 

            “I love you, Nicky.”  Greg’s arms tightened around the older man, a little afraid of what happened earlier that day and that he had just laid down his final card for Nick to see.  He could wait for Nick’s reaction later that night, however for the moment he wanted to pretend that everything was perfect.

 

===========================

 

            “Why didn’t you wake me up?”  Nick snapped, he had only thirty minutes until his shift started and Greg was already showered and dressed.  He threw off the covers and got out of bed, heading towards the bathroom to take a quick shower.

 

            “Aw, I love it when you walk around naked,” his boyfriend teased.  “I can see Nicky Jr.”

 

            Nick glared at him and snatched the sheet off the bed and wrapped it around his waist.  “I need to get ready for work.”

 

            “I called the lab and told them you were sick.”

 

            “What?  Why the hell did you do that?”  Nick’s displeasure increased.  He didn’t want Grissom to think that he was being childish by calling in sick after their unpleasant discussion.  They were also in the middle of an important case and even though Catherine was going to help them, it would take a little while for her to get fully caught up.

 

            Greg shrugged, “I thought you could use the time away from Grissom and from me.  When I talked to him, Grissom said he understood.  He knows it was my idea, so you don’t have to worry about anything.”

 

            Nick sighed and rubbed at his face, he was tired and decided that it was too early to be having an argument.  “Look, I really appreciate the thought, but you should have asked me first and honestly, I don’t need time away from anyone, what I need to do is my job.”

 

            Greg guided him back to bed to sit down and stood in front of him to make sure he didn’t make a move to get ready for work.  “No, you need to think things through.  Yesterday Grissom dumped a lot of things on you and so did I.”

 

            “Greg, you didn’t dump anything on me.  You already told me you loved me, you kind of mumbled it when you were half asleep.”

 

            Greg’s eyes widened.  “What?!  When was this?  I don’t remember any of this!”

 

            “I didn’t think you did.  It was after the first time we had sex.”

 

            “And you never told me this because?”

 

            “I didn’t know if you really meant it,” Nick whispered.

 

            Ruffling Nick’s hair, Greg gave him a small smile.  “Well, I did.  I love you now and I loved you then.  But right now I just want you to be a hundred percent sure of what you want, with all outside influences gone.  This is all a lot to deal with and maybe it would be best if you faced Grissom when you know exactly what’s going on in here,” Greg said as he tapped Nick’s chest.

 

            Looking up at Greg, Nick asked, “What if I know what I want?”

 

            “Then you get a free day off.  But seriously, think about it.  I can’t even imagine what it’s like to have two people proclaim their undying love for you in the same day.”

 

            “I don’t recall him saying that he was in love with me, just that he cares for me more than he should.”

 

            “I’m pretty sure in Grissom speech that means ‘I love you and I want to have your babies’.”

 

            “Be serious, Greg!”  Nick lightly pushed the other man.

 

            “I am!  I’m being perfectly serious.  I really want you to take everything into consideration.”  Greg leaned down and gave the older man a kiss.  “Though hopefully my god gifted skills in bed have helped to erase the words Gil Grissom from your vocabulary.”

 

            “I think those god gifted skills have helped to erase every word from my vocabulary and make me sore in places I didn’t even knew existed.”

 

            Concern clouded Greg’s face.  “I wasn’t too rough, was I?  I know I kind of got carried away.”  He looked down at the massive hickey on Nick’s wrist.

 

            Nick almost shivered at the thought of all the hickeys and bite marks Greg had left on his body.  He could feel the possessiveness Greg felt for him and knew that the sensation from the marks would remain there long after they faded.  But he had given as good as he got.  Greg’s clothes hid it, but his back, shoulders and sides were covered in scratches from his fingernails, probably some bruises on the upper arms where Nick had held on for dear life and there was at least one bite on Greg’s shoulder from when Nick tried to muffle a scream of pleasure.  Greg had been equally marked by the possessiveness that lived in Nick.

 

            “You were perfect.”  Nick took a handful of the front of Greg’s shirt and pulled him down for a long, soft kiss.  “And you should go to work.  If only one of us is going in tonight you might as well go in on time.”

 

            “I guess.” 

 

            Greg seemed a little reluctant to leave, but was put to ease when Nick smiled and said, “I’ll be here when you come back, Greggo.”

 

            After Greg left, Nick slept in for a little while before doing what his boyfriend asked him to do.  Nick thought about what he wanted.

 

            He thought about it as he showered and almost reached for his preferred brand of soap that somehow became a permanent fixture in the shower, but at the last second decided to use the soap Greg always used.  He thought about it as he dried himself off with his designated towel which hung on the back of the bathroom door next to Greg’s.  He thought about it as he brushed his teeth with his extra toothbrush that had a home next to Greg’s toothbrush in the toothbrush holder.  He thought about it as he pulled open the drawer that Greg had emptied out for him and was filled with his clothes.  He thought about it when he ate a bowl of Cheerios and fat free milk, neither of them were favorites of Greg’s, but the younger man kept them around for Nick.

 

            Slowly Greg had incorporated himself into Nick’s heart like Nick had unconsciously incorporated himself in Greg’s apartment.  He didn’t want to think about his life before Greg made himself a part of it and Nick realized that Gil threatened to take away the stabilizing force in his life that was Greg Sanders.  Nick had no doubt that he would always have a soft spot in his heart for Gil; he would always feel some lust for the older man.  Gil had been the first person Nick had real passionate romantic feelings for, even if he couldn’t find away to appropriately express them.  But most of those emotions were now focused on Greg.  While the thought of Greg being in love with him and getting him to open up still scared Nick, the thought of leaving Greg scared him even more.

TBC

AN- Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out. Hopefully the next one will come out sooner :)

Comments

[tanisafan.livejournal.com]

Aw, I still love this! You write a great Greg, and I really like the way you describe Nick's mixed feelings, which seem very realistic.
This is such a lovely and sexy story, I'm looking forward to the next chapter =)

[girlnorth.livejournal.com]

Yay! Thank you for not being stupid, Nick. ;)

Still really enjoying this story.